The other shoe drops

Mayor Morrissey has been warning us for months (mostly after his re-election ) that a second round of layoffs was on the way. Now it's here.

The mayor's office issued a statement late in the day, well after the 6 PM newscasts, from what I'm told by union brethren, and after the Rockford talk radio stations had yielded to syndicated programming and reduced power for the night.

But the mayor made sure that the Wanxiang (pronounced wang-chung, as best I can tell) groundbreaking was a top news story all day. The press was all too eager to oblige the space/time-killer that made their jobs easier.

How many times is this guy gonna pat himself on the back over something that was only marginally newsworthy months ago? I mean, really, what part of this story is new aside from the gold shovel photo-op? Nothing's new. It's just another attempt to polish a turd.

That's admirable, Larry. Announce that you're eliminating 60 city jobs (30 already through attrition, plus 30 more layoffs) the same day you re-announced you've created 60 for a private company being subsidized by debt to taxpayers. That's music to our ears. Should we thank you now?

Morrissey was recently quoted in the weekly as saying the cuts are nothing to apologize for. Really, Larry? Aren't you about to take another trip to China on the taxpayer dime? I and plenty of others can't even afford to take the family to the Dells, so you probably better not come home without 1,000 PetroChina jobs in your pocket, or we might begin to question your sincerity.

Mark my words, the city is going to be facing at least one civil/human rights lawsuit (re: Barmore), and it won't be cheap. My gut tells me the officers probably fucked up, and we need only look at the county to see how how much something like that affects us.

We're going to pay the Bachman family more than $15,000,000 for the questionable judgment of just one deputy. That figure is sure to rise, because there's still another civil suit waiting in the wings.

As for the latest city cuts, these are union jobs we're talking about, so I can only guess public safety is at stake since they're negotiating new contracts. This is where Doug Block is sure to re-emerge from hibernation for the first time since losing to Morrissey in April.

If he cares about winning an election, Block's sure to run again in 2013. After all, even Larry lost his first bid, but he'll be an even easier, doe-eyed target by the time the next election rolls around.

Larry wants the union employees to suck it up just like the unrepresented employees had to. After winning re-election without the support of the unions, Morrissey has nothing to lose by offering them a Cleveland Steamer now. I talked a lot about this during the mayoral race, and I still say the police and fire unions made a political misstep by not making concessions then, which they're going to pay even more for now.

On the other hand, it's just not right for the mayor and aldermen to take public dollars from public jobs and give them to private companies, but it's their show, and none were voted out of office this year. I suppose we get the government we deserve.

We the Taxpayers of Rockford pay more than our fair share for the services we expect the city to deliver, but they're telling us we're expecting too much because of the drunken sailor spending spree that leaves them broke. Yet the city continues accumulating new debt at full steam so they can offer incentives to private developers that really have nothing to offer us when all's said and done. Sure they can boast new jobs, but at the cost of how many others? It's only the "new jobs" that are mentioned come re-election time, and the challengers are often too inexperienced to have any knowledge of how easily they could overturn the status quo.

Now, after proposing another round of cuts to basic city service jobs, the mayor is gonna skip town for China, but I'm sure he'll send us a postcard if there's another flood.

Speaking of weather, pray we have a mild winter. Snow plowing was specifically mentioned as an operation that will suffer from the cuts. But that could change, because William Charles/Rockford Blacktop is overseeing Rockford's advisory budget committee.

If you ask me, when the cuts are made, my money is on snow plowing being spared. After all, if there's less plowing, the roads won't need to be replaced so soon, and Billy Chuck wouldn't want that.

Threatened with a tantrum, council succombs to demand for raise in allowance

Trying to save face in front of an enraged citizenry, aldermen perpetrated the oldest confidence game in the book Monday night, with taxpayers as the mark (no pun intended).

Despite quick hands, the council gave the Metrocentre exactly what it requested.

Completely unreliable sources tell me Andres Sammul and Corey Pearson exchanged briefcases in an elevator after the meeting. The briefcase Pearson walked away with allegedly had $250,000 cash, while Sammul's case only had a crudely scribbled note on a strip club napkin that read, 'Thanks, Pops."

The council decided: "Aw, shucks. OK, we'll 'loan' you some more money for old times sake, but we can't keep doing this. I mean, what if my wife finds out?"

Well, the bitches (that is, we the taxpayers) did find out, but I'll bet a good number of folks around the horseshoe are glad to have kept it under wraps until after the elections.

There were whispers, just prior to the April 7 election, that the Metrocentre wouldn't last through June. Doug Block's camp was talking about it, but they never pushed it beyond the rumor stage.

Then again, it wasn't only Morrissey who'd stand to lose if Block brought it to the forefront. Plenty of Block's fellow Democrats share the blame with Larry, and that's my best guess as to why Block backed off.

So, what will we get to show for the latest $600,000 we'll never see again? Two new appointed committees adding more layers to the bureaucratic kangaroo court of city government. If all goes well, they may even get budgets of their own.

One committee will focus specifically on the Metrocentre, making sure the big orange problem child behaves while the city dangles the remaining $350,000 like a carrot on a stick.

The other committee will make sure the whip is cracked on the asses of the Coronado, On the Waterfront and others. Essentially, the city is pretending to be strict disciplinarians when it comes to taxpayer dollars, but their unwillingness once again to teach the Metrocentre Authority a hard lesson only proves they are pushovers.

Let 'em shut down for the rest of the year if they can't learn to run the place like a business. The only way to burn money that fast is on strippers and blow. The Metrocentre made lofty promises they did not deliver, and I've yet to hear any council member question the leadership over there.

I suspect that's because the MC board is led by the police chief's wife. Still, Pearson has always come across as a real punk and I suspect his salary far outweighs his actual contributions to the cause. I'll be curious to see what the new committee will have to say about the MC officers and command staff, if anything at all.

I finally got around to watching my tape from Thursday's county board meeting. When Karen Elyea announced it would be her last meeting, colleagues responded with a standing ovation.

After having conducted an unscientific, anonynous poll, Rockford Rhetoric learned most board members just seemed glad to see her go.

I'd wager Tuffy Quinonez is demanding the appointment as reparation after being scorned by Elyea in the Democratic primary for the 11th Ward city council seat, but my money's against him.

Jim Hughes has an especially heavy pimp-hand in the 11th Ward, and I suspect Tuffy is not on the Irishman's short list of flunkies to finish Elyea's term. I can't wait to see who he digs up.

Speaking of Hughes, a little bird told me an interesting story that this blog's Site Meter data appears to corroborate after I physically verified locations of several interesting publicly-funded IP addresses frequenting this site.

I'll save that for another day.

The big orange problem child

Met-ro-cen-tre
n.
1. A hole in downtown Rockford into which money is poured

What's another $600,000 we'll never see again? That's how it's gonna go down and there's nothing you can do about it.

I returned home to Rockford this weekend from my jaunt in Puerto Rico and returned to work today, recharged and more Patriotic than ever.

Spade, I did get some longboarding (and plenty of sun) in by day. By night, well, that was time for serious debauchery with old friends aboard a yacht called Vajoliroja, which is bigger than my house.

It was hard to leave, especially since I hadn't even pissed off the San Juan authorities yet. But here I am, giving serious consideration to negotiating an early retirement package with my financially strapped public employer. I would think they'd be happy to get rid of me at nearly any cost, but we'll see how far I can push it.

In games of chance, either I'm lucky or my systems simply work. In any case, I think I could easily replace my income by instead spending 40 hours a week at the tracks and at card games.

Going back to work today was nearly enough to make me forget my toes had been wrestling with sand in a carefree paradise for the past week, which can sure make a guy resent working for a living.

The regular crowd was absent from the compound's usual city council drinking event. I suspect they haven't realized I've returned, and that's just as well. I could use the quiet.

Oh, I still drank as I watched the meeting, but at least I was able to do it in peace.

Okay, the Metrocentre wants a $600,000 loan so its employees and other obligations can get paid a little while longer.

They say one of the main disappointments is that naming rights haven't been sold yet. Don't worry, lads and lasses, I fully expect to visit the Puri Center in the near future

The council keeps on getting put in the position of injecting more tax dollars into a Titanic disaster, because the Authority Board knows the city has too much invested to cut them off now. Truly, think of it as using a bucket to rid water from the hull of the doomed luxury liner.

You know, Doug Block mumbled about this issue during the mayoral campaign, but he should have spoken louder, as it was obviously put off by Morrissey until after the election. Alas, hindsight is always 20/20, they say.

What I don't understand is why the city keeps bailing the Metrocentre out, but that the leadership there is never questioned. These people promised us grand results for the $20,000,000+ they talked us into not very long ago and it's time to pull rank and appoint some competence.

-"You think I'm skimming off the top, Mike?"
-"No, I think you're unlucky. Maybe we can do better."

Report from a degenerate gambler

By now, you already know I cleaned up on the mayor's race. I just woke up a couple hours ago and am enjoying a three-martini breakfast. Tomorrow I collect what I wasn't able to Tuesday night. I expect resistance in a couple cases, so I've procured a private security agency to keep things civil.

By the way, the Yater is already paid for and waiting in San Juan, where we'll be united Saturday.

For all the barking the Blockheads did over the last month or so, they failed to even break the skin at the polls. Now get your fucking shine boxes.

Don't get me wrong, you won't find more critical coverage over the next four years than right here, so Larry-bashers are encouraged to stay tuned.

This will be the place new candidates are born, Patriots, so let's keep the dialogue going and take back city hall next time around. Hell, let's start our own Patriot Party.

The upset of the night: Useless Dan Conness managed to beat Pete MacKay for Rockford Township highway commissioner. I noticed Pete was running an awful lot of ads in the days before the race, but I never suspected he was in any trouble. Luckily, no one else thought Conness had a chance either, so I didn't lose anything on this race, except maybe faith in humanity. I vastly overestimated voter turnout, which I understand was only about 25%. Ouch. Pete's friends obviously stayed home Tuesday, and now look what's happened. The township has lost a friend and gained a fiend.

Those of you affected by the asphalt plant oughta be ashamed for allowing that to happen. Although many of you aren't in the city proper, my understanding is that you are in the township. If any of you really think Conness tried to stop the foul-smelling carcinogenic horror from coming to your neighborhood, think again. The same goes for your county board rep's. You've gotten what you deserve for your ignorance, you poor fools. See you in hell after a brief battle in the cancer ward. Morrissey was not your enemy, and Conness does not appear to have been your friend.

It occurred to me, however, that maybe John Harmon outsmarted everyone. If you'll recall, Harmon and a handful of others tried to oust MacKay by holding a caucus instead of a primary. The media actually took notice as it turned out, and no Republican had the balls to challenge Pete for the nomination. Then Harmon's closet buddy - Conness, a DINO - announced he was gonna run. Many laughed, including me, but Harmon and Conness are having a good chuckle now. Further proof of Harmon's political prowess, yes, but also evidence of what seems to be an exceedingly bitter nature.

Still, I'd like to spill a few with John. I'll bet he's one hell of a fun drunk. If only he could use his powers for good...

Betting against my heart - a guilty pleasure: The council is rid of Dapper Dan at least, but he'll be replaced by another dud in another ward, Karen Elyea. She who has the most yard signs wins, and that's how I was counting on the relatively uneducated 11th Ward to vote. My disdain for Elyea's plasticity and her apparent lack of any moral center nearly kept me from winning $1100 Tuesday night, but I wagered with my gut, not my heart. For what it's worth, I take little pleasure in having been right.

It was a bittersweet victory, but one that taught the part-time gambling rubes here at the compound an expensive lesson: Betting on who should win is folly.

Like the council with Conness, the county board will be rid of Elyea, but I shudder to think what kind of monster the likes of Doug Aurand will replace her with. For the liberals out there, you can take some comfort in knowing that at least it will be a real Democrat this time. Hopefully, they'll think about Mr. Latham for the seat. In any case, board Democrats will level the political landscape a bit with whomever replaces Elyea. They'll probably just move Jeff Polsean to the ward, since he can't seem to buy a seat anywhere else.

By the way, Democrat sources tell me they plan to vote in favor of Democratic-contributor Sunil Puri's special use permit at county board Thursday night. Whether Republicans plan to make it a partisan issue will be determined at the meeting. Republicans technically have enough votes to kill it should they choose, but I suspect there will be a lot of absences, so I'm not optimistic. Puri is smart enough to hedge his bets usually, but he was really counting on Democrats taking over the board in November, so Republicans could exact their revenge Thursday if they wanted to. I doubt they have the cajones, however.

One race I lost money on was township clerk. Overestimating voter turnout, as in MacKay's case, I had money on Diane Dal Pra Mitchell to keep her seat. Jeff Holt won that one, and I think the township will still be well-served, but it's obvious the Democrats really got the vote out in Rockford Township.

I really got beat up in the township races, but I ended up way ahead overall, so I can't complain. I lost a little by betting on Don Hall, who was challenging Mickey Goral for supervisor. I really hope Mr. Hall stays involved, because his political future is absolutely blinding. If he hasn't already, Hall needs to get together with another Patriot, Gen. John Borling, for some pointers. I think they'd get along famously.

Eli Nicolosi, you're a reader and I hold you personally accountable for the $350 I lost on your behalf in the trustee races! But I know you're good for it, and you also have a bright political future. We can work something out when I need a favor. Keep your chin up, kid, and remember who the real Patriots are.

You may or may not hear from me before my toes are in the sands of Puerto Rico this weekend, but you're all in my heart.

See you soon, Patriots.

Who I’m endorsing, and who I’ll actually vote for...

I'm gonna try to keep this as short as possible, because I'm not in the mood right now. As predicted, they started arriving shortly before 10AM today, already smelling like breweries, brandishing firearms and compelled to gamble on each of the local races. I'm sick of them already, but by the time the polls open in the morning, I'll get my second wind to carry me until all precincts have reported.

By the way, Mr. Nicolosi, I've got big money riding on you for a township spot. Don't let me down, kiddo. I'm told my oldest needs braces.

When the city council drinking game was finished this evening, an inexplicable lull came over the compound - the calm before the storm on election day, I suppose. Anyway, I'm taking this moment to deliver what I've promised.

April 7 will be a long night for those of us watching the local races. Some will celebrate victories, other will mourn defeats, and I expect to do a little of both.

We have a choice, fellow Patriots. The choice is whether we keep city hall in the hands of the lawyers, or give it to the cops - Not a comfortable decision to make, as both industries continue to cause significant amounts of grief in my own life.

There are, of course, two other candidates for mayor, but even before the Democratic primary was decided, it was clear the race would be between Block and incumbent Morrissey.

Jesus Correa is still plugging along, usually showing up for forums and debates when he’s invited. By the time this election’s done, Jesus might actually have learned quite a bit, but I don’t suspect we’ll see him run again in four years. However, I would wholeheartedly endorse Correa for a leadership position that will give him the resources to craft downtown into his inspired yet attainable vision.

I also liked his comments about the police. As he deftly noted, people fear cops whether they’ve done anything wrong or not. No one is happy to see a cop in their rear-view mirror, yet they’re never around when you need them, right?

Correa advocated for officers to actually get to know the residents of the communities they protect – an excellent idea. Too much time is spent driving around in squad cars instead of doing the legwork that makes a difference. Police need to build relationships with citizens if we’re gonna put a real dent in crime. Better yet, Jello Biafra once proposed that police officers should be elected by the neighborhoods they serve.

Lord knows the neighbors need someone to turn to when they find me pissing in their rose bushes and blasting a shotgun into the air at 5AM on a Sunday.

John Harmon, you’ve got a lot of wisdom and sensible ideas. During this campaign, you have been consistently stellar in identifying problems and presenting solutions. As far as my score sheet is concerned, you won every debate.

Comparing the cases presented by all four candidates, I hereby endorse John H. Harmon for mayor of Rockford, but that's not who I'll be voting for.

Unfortunately, John’s strengths are in politics, not in making friends. When you’re running as a Republican in a city of Democrats, you’ve already got an uphill battle. Add to that the fact that few in your own party support you and you’ve got, as Larry would say, a tough row to hoe.

John, I recommend you retire from running for office. Instead, you could keep your hand in things as a campaign consultant. Believe it or not, that actually might give folks like Jim Thacker something to worry about. Give it some serious thought. [Patriot’s note: I wrote this suggestion last night, prior to hearing Mr. Harmon mention such a possibility during today’s WNTA debate].

While Harmon, point for point, presented the strongest arguments to earn my endorsement, he simply cannot win, so my actual vote must be cast either for Larry or for Doug.

Doug is a well-liked guy. Considering that he worked internal affairs (not a popular position in the department), it's impressive that he has the full trust of Rockford's finest. And no matter what Larry dishes out, Block will be okay in my book, too.

However, I can’t ignore that he obviously has the interests of the police union at heart. His knowledge about other issues, quite frankly, is not up to snuff this time around. The problem, I think, is that Block’s candidacy is more about dethroning Larry than anything else. Beyond that, Doug doesn’t appear to have real plans yet to address the multitude of issues facing the city if he’s actually elected.

On the other hand, just about everyone who voted for Larry feels let down.

If we learned anything from the GW Bush debacle, however, choosing the guy you’d most like to do blow with while driving drunk isn’t always the best course of action. When it comes to that, there’s no question I’d rather party with Doug, but this is no Tijuana titty-bar.

At Block’s present level of fluency with the issues, I’m much more inclined to leave things in Larry’s hands right now, and I’ll grudgingly cast my vote for Morrissey.

There you have it, for whatever it's worth.

This is a tighter race than Larry would like, but I predict he'll win it. I've got money on it in fact, and I'm determined to fleece the derelicts in my living room who think Block has the edge.

If Morrissey is re-elected, I'll be scrambling to collect an estimated $14,000 in winnings before I board a plane for San Juan Saturday. In which case, a new Reynolds Yater high performance longboard will be my first purchase once I hit the beach. The remainder will, of course, be spent on foolish endeavors I hope to remember later.

Hang loose, Patriots.

Charlie Box don't surf!

I promised an endorsement, while also acknowledging it shouldn't count for anything - because who the fuck am I, right? Regardless, as much as I spout off about these poor bastards running for mayor, I can't go limp now.

I will be voting, I'll have to make a choice and I will share it with you the night before I do so. I don't care to sway your vote. You have your own reasons and beliefs. I'll just tell you what decided it for me as best I can.

It might come late, but by the time you wake to go about your civic duty on Tuesday, The Patriot will have spoken.

I'm really trying to keep an open mind until the WNTA debate is over Monday. That'll be the last stand for all 4 gentlemen and I expect friends, political figures and strangers will start dropping by the compound sometime Monday morning, demanding to start the tailgate party.

Once I wake up Monday, there'll be no sleep until Wednesday. When I regain consciousness sometime Thursday or Friday, I'll lick my wounds and pack my bags for Puerto Rico. I'm leaving Saturday, but will stay connected through the miracle of the porn machine. Some friends are making a movie (not a porno) in San Juan and I wanna get some color before summer.It'll be a nice break. I need to get to the beach for a recharge every now and then. Normally, I head home to San Marcos, CA. Most of the family is out that way, and I like to do a little surfing when I can.

By the way, I highly recommend winter surfing on Lake Michigan when you can't get to an ocean.

But it's been too long since I've been to Puerto Rico and it'll be good to see old friends. Mid-April typically marks the end of peak surfing down there, but I'm hoping for some nice swell anyway. Then again, I might just stick around there to do some surfing when hurricane season starts in June.

We'll just have to see how long the local authorities will be tolerant of me before I have to make a hasty exit from the archipelago.

Fear not. We're in it together as we inherit whatever disaster we find ourselves stuck with April 8.

Take comfort in knowing we've got 4 years to make sure Dave Syverson gets his dick knocked in the dirt when he runs for mayor.

OK, now that I've got the attention of Block and the PBPA

I noticed that my friendly suggestions to Doug were reposted on the the PBPA's blog, and I'm humbled that Rockford's Finest see merit in them. I'm glad you've taken notice, because Doug can win this thing, despite the awful week he's having at a crucial time. Heed the 10 tips I posted previously and you'll be well on your way - but waste no time.

Okay, as it turns out, Larry beat you to the Rick Nielsen endorsement, but that one was more of a joke than anything, so don't despair. Endorsements are like assholes anyway.

Now is the time to go back on the offensive - immediately. You're a self-described bulldog, Doug, so start biting and don't let go.

Having any luck with the Coppergate or Brauns suggestions? Those are biggies. I'd also urge you to concentrate on pledging to put a stop to the riverwalk. MFT funds might be better spent on roads, don't you think? Everyone knows the only one who wants the riverwalk is Larry - so that when he's no longer mayor, he can gaze from his office window in the Morrissey building and see his brick legacy along the river.

Since roads are a part of your platform, stress the need for accountability when it comes to the quality and longevity of the product. Like it or not, the cheapest bid isn't always the best course, and Rockford Blacktop (which isn't even located in Rockford, despite its name) needs to do a lot better after being hand-fed an asphalt plant by Larry. They should be put on notice that their bids will no longer be accepted if we have to replace their roads every few years.

Is there some reason it's the city burden to maintain the shitty roads we pay handsomely for? That should be the responsibility of the contractors, to ensure quality workmanship in the first place. Maintenance should be part of the contracts.

Also, as Spade agreed in his comment, like it or not, a casino is inevitable, so you might as well embrace it, Doug. You'd be surprised how much the State of Illinois will want to help Rockford when there are gambling revenues to be had.

By the way, Spade, there's always room for Jello here at the compound, so kudos to you for recognizing another Prophet and Patriot in Mr. Biafra.

Speaking of gambling, there's the matter of that card-game-gone-bad on Kishwaukee Street in October 2007. Everyone knows there were important folks there, and at least some members of the PBPA must know who they are. We're all ears, and your anonymity is assured by The Patriot. Drop me a line via comment (which I'll keep private), and The Patriot will do the rest. As stupid as the three young men were to allegedly rob the game, they don't deserve to be charged with murder. Be heroes and let the real story be told. Rockford wants to know. I'd love to print the tale as a work of fiction so that the more intelligent among us can read between the lines for some semblance of the truth.

That aside, I'll be waiting for Mr. Block to put some of my suggestions to work for him before the weekend, and I've got plenty more to dish out before Tuesday if he actually starts to listen. I won't even send you a consulting bill, Mr. Block. We can negotiate that for the next campaign in 4 years. I'd just hate to see Larry win simply because of his crybaby antics on Tuesday. Give him something to really cry about, Doug.

The Patriot has spoken, and it is so.

Humping Block's leg pays off for Elyea?

Republican Karen Elyea, who seems to call herself a Democrat only as a matter of convenience and opportunity, has been laughing all the way to her campaign coffer, thanks to union contributions she's gotten by following Doug Block around like a puppy dog.

The local fire fighters' union contributed, because they apparently assumed she's pro-union, since they've undoubtedly seen her riding Block's coattails.

Likewise, IBEW, the Northwestern Illinois Building and Construction Trades Council, the iron workers, plasterers & cement masons and laborers have thrown financing Elyea's way.

"Civilian" contributors to her campaign include Republican county board member Randy Olson. Additionally, Elyea's campaign documents show that she hired former Republican county board member Chris K. Johnson's River District Catering for a fundraiser.

It appears to me Karen might do or say anything to get what she wants, but for the unions who hope she gets elected, she'll be your worst nightmare, because she's probably already forgotten you. You'll learn that she cares primarily about her own agenda, and unions don't likely factor into it. Sorry, Charlie.

Where are all the contributions from people in her ward who believe in her? That's easy: There aren't any. Not one.

Advice to Doug Block: Choose your friends more carefully, because everyone else in Rockford seems to know more about Elyea than you do, and she could be hurting your chances of being taken seriously. And don't be afraid to ask your PBPA members about drug charges against her in 2003, and whether they believe there's more to that.

Block campaign begins to unravel

Just two or three weeks ago, Doug Block was having the best week ever. Could it be he peaked too early in the campaign? We shall see, because here in the home stretch, Mayor Morrissey is really pouring it on to swing the momentum in his own favor.

Larry convened what was apparently an invitation-only scandalfest for the media Tuesday at Forest Hills Country Club, just moments after he'd eaten lunch beside Block.

From what I understand, Larry showed members of the local press obscene text messages that none of them could possibly air or print. Why would he do this? Is it because his feelings were hurt?

I wouldn't count on it. He simply knows it'll make Block look like an ignorant union goon. Well, son Dan certainly looks like an ass, because this little thing could be enough to derail his dad's campaign, even though Doug cut Dan loose from the campaign a day later. The damage is already done, with less than a week to recover.

If we've learned anything from the Billy Carters and Roger Clintons of this world, Doug, it's that some family members oughta be mailed to Nepal during a campaign, and kept there if you're elected.

Larry's point: The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

Apparently, Larry wheeled out some other complaints about Block's supporters, but they had little, if anything, to do with Doug himself. I think Larry really just wanted an excuse for giving the media hardons by confiding in them the contents of the text message, so as to perhaps manipulate the local press to put Block on the defensive, regardless of how silly it all is.

As I understand it, and mentioned earlier, Doug and Larry apparently attended some sort of candidate luncheon at Forest Hills CC just before the private donkey show. Obviously, Larry wanted Doug to see the media filing in as the luncheon ended. Naturally, Doug would stick around to see what's up.

After Larry got the local press all spun into a frenzy behind closed doors, he turned them loose on Block, who was apparently waiting right outside for the ambush. Very calculated.

Chuck Sweeny's column today brought up another good point. Doug's been running an ad based on a Register Star article he obviously never finished reading. What's sad is that it's starting to appear that Doug doesn't even realize the claim in his ad is false.

I personally think Doug's a good guy, but that he's really not fluent in issues unrelated to the police. If he doesn't win this time around, he can become awfully strong in the next four years if he broadens his horizons.

Adding to Block's woes, I see Frank Schier threw his endorsement behind Morrissey. Not a surprise after Larry threw Schier a bone Monday by backing off on industrial zoning along the Kish. Both men got what they wanted.

But you know it's a close race when Larry actually needs TRRT's endorsement, and I'm willing to bet Block was hoping to get it himself. It's just that tight.

If you think it's ugly now, just wait to see what Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Monday will bring. Those are the days that will decide this race.

Now is the point in the campaign where Larry will reach deep into his substantial warchest to bury Block if at all possible. This week, you'll see the difference having lots of money makes, Doug.

I certainly hope that Mr. Block is a reader by now. I have some advice that may be of help in these last days before the election:

1. Doug McDuff is trying to get the two of you in a room together. Take that opportunity. Begin by offering a sincere, public apology for the conduct of some of your supporters. Make it short, but heartfelt. Then, say, "Now, let's talk about the issues."
   
2. No more TIF districts. John Harmon is absolutely correct in his assertion that they are a BIG source of debt. Give John a call. I have the feeling he'd be happy to brief you, because I'm sure he knows he can't win. Beating Larry is good enough for him any way he can get it. And don't be afraid to credit Jesus Correa with questioning the success of TIF in the case of Anderson Packaging. This is right up your alley, Doug, and it'll show voters you know about more than just union bullshit. This is a story about 167 loyal Anderson workers getting fucked right after the city gave them $1.1 million to expand and create new jobs, and Larry calls it a victory. Sure, Anderson will probably hire enough illegal aliens at low wages in order to live up to its end of the bargain of creating jobs, but a lot of good people got canned. Be outraged about it, because you oughta be.
3. Advocate for a casino downtown.
4. Get Rick Nielsen to endorse you.
5. Pledge to sell the IceHogs to a responsible local buyer if at all possible. Although you love the team, you should be opposed to city ownership. Do you suppose Dr. T and Craig could afford to buy them back now? Maybe it's just a pipe dream, but maybe not. Start making some calls and crunching some numbers, and undo an injustice done by Larry to the team you love.
   
6. Tie Morrissey family relations to Coppergate. The connection is there.
7. Draw attention to Ryan Brauns' connections to Morrissey while also being on the Board of Elections (not to mention consulting contract[s]). Talk about a fucking conflict.
8. Advocate for concealed carry. The county board has already shown its willingness. Pledge to work with them to educate the public on the facts and dispel the myths. Then, an advisory referendum will pass, which will put a little more pressure on the legislature.
9. Kill the riverwalk. That'll happen on its own once the casino is downtown, without having to go through people's backyards.
   
10. Change your position on removing the pedestrian mall. It's a good thing to get rid of it.

There's 10 to get ya started, Doug. If I see you using any of these recommendations in the next couple days, I'll be glad to offer further counsel.

The Patriot has spoken, and it is so.

I'm spent. Ruthlessly drunk. The kids are asleep and the wife is waiting. As my balls slap against her in a matter of moments, I'll be thinking about election day.

Ode to Jesus

Mr. Correa:

I watched the debate from the balcony of the Coronado Wednesday night, donning my Phantom of the Opera mask, and your mom can be proud of her son.

I agree with you 100% that downtown should resemble On the Waterfront at all times, which you've said at more than one debate. It's amazing what a few colored lights, delicious smells and the sound of music in the air can do to make downtown a vibrant place people want to be. I would urge you to get involved with or start your own arts-based downtown group that embodies your vision. I think we'd both agree the mayor's office deals with too many things beyond your areas of passion and expertise, and that downtown specifically could benefit from your full attention.

By the way, I don't recommend getting mixed up with the River District Association. They have their own ideas, and I suspect it involves "young professionals," not young minds. Just imagine thousands of Patrick Batemans living in a skyrise downtown. Eesh. I'm sure you know Kim Wheeler, so you must also understand she's probably unfit to be leading the charge to resurrect downtown, unless maybe it was still the 1980s.

Art + Politics = Power

Jesus, you're an artist, right? I propose you make downtown your new canvas. Every single other candidate in the mayor's race has taken precious debate time to applaud you in one way or another. In the next debate, you should ask each of them whether they will commit to your vision of downtown as a pedestrian-friendly festival atmosphere. Frankly, I'd like to know which of them recognizes the real merit and viability of transforming downtown in the very simple ways you've laid out. They would work wonders and give the city something to be proud of. Let's see who among them is willing to embrace a good idea that was not their own.

Make Larry and Doug, either of which could win at this point, give you a seat at the table.

By the way, you get a special shout-out for the Peter Criss sweater and the crack about Larry and Doug's personal argument. You were right in noting its absurdity, as was John Harmon when he called the issue a red herring.

Let's work on 2013 by transforming downtown first. If you can make an impact there, you will have the collective ear of the people as someone who is capable of attaining results. As I alluded in my last piece, a single citizen can often do more than a single elected official. It's the clout you gain now that will determine how far you can take things in the future.

Put on some gloves, Jesus, because it's time to start squeezing balls while you have a share of the spotlight with the other men running for mayor.

Shit, you may even wanna bluff by saying you're in command of a street army larger in number than Operation Desert Storm. Based on the sweater, I'd go so far as to suggest you claim to have the full allegiance of the Kiss Army at your behest. It couldn't hurt. Drive them with fear into utter submission, which is the intended place for an elected public servant.

Do this in remembrance of me.

Your friend,

The Patriot

Yep, I'm still smellin' trouble for Larry

Does anyone else get the feeling aldermen are delaying budget cuts until the last possible moment for the most devious of reasons?

Could it be council Democrats and Republicans, working in concert, are preparing for a March 30 drive-by anal-rape of all the projects Morrissey holds dear? I'm betting on it.

By delaying any real public deliberations on the budget cuts, Morrissey has been left in the dark and out of the loop, Baby.

I mean, they haven't talked about anything. There are, of course, the obvious issues of ambulance fees, minimum staffing in the fire department and the less-talked-about scheduling changes in the police department. But those are drops in the bucket when we're talking about $8 million worth of snips. They could be made anywhere, and it'll be fun watch, courtesy of handsomely-compensated, yet technologically inept, Comcast.

The trap will be sprung the night before the city's mandated deadline for passing its spending plan. If, for whatever reason, they don't pass a budget, the projected deficit just got a whole lot worse. It won't happen, though, despite Pat Curran's anxiety nightmares.

There's a bit of a Monday night ritual here at the compound. Friends, acquaintances, strangers and political figures begin knocking on my door around 4 pm, usually disturbing my breakfast, but at least they bear gifts, guns and good memories.

Martinis are deployed and smoke permeates the air. A line begins to form for the bathroom before the meeting eventually gets started, no less than 30 minutes late usually. A hundred tenuously-filled shot glasses litter the coffee table and the game begins. The rules are simple.

You drink a shot whenever:
-Linda McNeely says "Mr. Mayor"
-Larry says "Thank you very much," which we all repeat in Elvis voices
-Frank Beach votes against a liquor license
-Joe Sosnowski or Jeff Holt abstain from a vote because of a conflict of interest
-Pat Curran brings apple-related goodies for the council
-Doug Mark's hair is a little goofy
-Carl Wasco doesn't make sense
-Victory Bell says "aldermans"
-Lenny Jacobson says "Your Honor"
-Anne Thompson looks surprised because of a plastic surgery disaster
-Bill Timm thanks a department head
-John Beck tries to justify the millions of taxpayer dollars thrown into the Metrocentre
-Dan Conness fucks up trying to read

So, why will donkeys and elephants stampede together Monday night? Because the mayor is neither, Holmes.

This certainly isn't a year that Republicans expect to have a chance for the mayor's mansion. Even Jan Klaas is laughing at John Harmon. Kind of a shame any way you look at it. Historically, the guy's 100% unlikable, but I've gotta admit again, a conservative might be the best thing for the city right now. I know it won't happen, however, so that really just leaves Larry and Doug.

That is not meant to discourage Jesus Correa, by the way. He's stated there's no way he'll win, but that doesn't mean he hasn't got ideas that he's not in a unique position to share with a relatively wider audience than he'll find in a coffee shop or bar that's already tuned him out. I'm all ears, Jesus, and so are our readers. My invitation stands if you have any sort of platform you'd like to share.

It's encouraging to see that at least the local media acknowledge a Green Party candidate, and that Jesus is being included in the mayoral forums. I have much to teach you about running a real campaign, Jesus, but you and your friends are spending entirely too much time looking for clippings on this blog, and not nearly enough time getting off your Generation-Why? asses.

By the way, you and your friend - I'll call him beefcake - have developed impotence over some photo I posted along with a reference to you. HINT: Don't post it on the internet if you don't want people to see it.

[THIS IS NOT A PHOTO OF JESUS CORREA VII]

Is there a photo you'd prefer me to use, or should I just not give Correa any more free press? Shall I also remove Mr. Correa from my mayoral poll? Hell, I'll remove every reference to Jesus ever being in the race. Would that make you happy? Can do. Awaiting your prompt approval to do so, and I'll pull the butt-plug right away.

City Hall is already filled with assholes, beef-beef. There's no room for you, but you're welcome to stay in the political manger with the rest of the sheep and swine.

Free advice to Jesus: Ditch anyone who thinks that was a piece of photography good enough to be some sort of bargaining chip on a blog that means absolutely nothing to anyone.

Back to the two-way race between Block and Morrissey. For a time, I believed Republicans would stand behind Larry, because an independent is better than a Democrat in their eyes, right?

That does not seem to be the case now. The two parties appear to be doing away with any hope for a three-or-more-party system in Rockford, despite indie aldermanic candidates. Larry was set-up from the beginning, and it'll be a long time before another third-party candidate holds the mayor's office. Aldermen will do their best to see to that March 30.

That's not to say I support Larry. We're just talking politics here. Jesus (not Correa), take your heart and blood pressure medications already. Mr. Correa, you should probably take your meds, too, whatever they may be. We will all need to be heavily sedated once Doug Block or Larry Morrissey wins.

Why wait? I think I'll sedate myself now.

It doesn't seem to be working. Shit.

Register Star profile of 11th Ward race

Well, based on what the three 11th Ward candidates had to say in the Register Star today, there is a clear choice: Independent James Bryan Latham.

Of the three, he's the only one that mentioned doing what is best for the ward.

For those of you who were at the Heartland forum, did anyone else think the bizarre manner in which "Democrat" Karen Elyea spoke was indicative of long-term buzz-chasing? I'm thinking she might have a closet freon-huffing habit, but I can't be sure. Maybe I'm just being paranoid, but I can't bring myself to trust this shifty chica. Sorry, Nurgle, I know you've gotta live with her. My condolences.

And I don't mean to insult a reader, honestly. Please understand that I don't care what someone does for a living.

No one knows better than me that not all of life's pleasures are legitimate. After all, my welcome mat says, "Come back with a warrant."

Hypothetically speaking, I would favor a candidate who'd get involved with the political system in order to change unjust laws. However, if that candidate were to engage in politics simply to corner a market in an area, I'd have a problem with that, especially if their business involved children. Luckily, there's no one like that around here, right?

Elyea's stated biggest issue in the race was just a simple rehash of Doug Block's platform, going as far as to actually say, "Now is the time to get back to the basics," a Block catch-phrase. Elyea's been humping lots of union legs to ride the Block coattails while the gettin' is good. But I suspect she'd pledge her loyalty to anyone who will help her get an elected job that pays $12,000, instead of the $7,500 one she has now on the county board.

Latham, 44, is the executive director of the Total Health Awareness Team, or THAT, president of the Midtown District Inc, and owner of Midtown Marketplace. Talk about a guy with his hand on the pulse of everything in the 11th Ward.

You can't deny drugs and prostitution are issues in that ward, and when the two mix, even worse problems emerge. While needle exchanges in the neighborhood may not be something for residents to brag about, the need for such a program is clearly justified there.

One might argue having a needle exchange in the the 11th Ward attracts the dope addicts to the neighborhood, but the simple fact is that the problem was already there. That's not to say there isn't some design behind why the drug markets appear to be tolerated in certain areas of the city.

Drug dealers and pimps seem to make sure subsidized cops don't disrupt their business as long as no shots are fired. Driving around the city, we all see areas obviously infested by the criminal element - and they appear to be permitted and even corralled within areas that nice, rich folks pretend don't exist.

In places like that, the cops seem to just drive by the obvious criminal activity being done out in the open. If they really wanted to establish a presence, they'd park their squad cars wherever the ne'er-do-wells gather. But if they did that, there's the possibility the crime would move to where those nice, rich people live instead, and we wouldn't want that.

Another independent candidate, Wade Hendrickson, targeted wasteful spending in City Hall as the big issue. Yes, that's a problem, but how will you adress the issues unique to the 11th Ward?

Simply stated, vote Latham.

Aldermen getting cold feet over ambulance rates

After realizing how truly absurd and potentially tragic it would be to begin charging more than double the current rate for ambulance service, councilmen started going limp on the idea this week.

God knows there are people in other communities, like Cherry Valley, who pay less taxes and get their ambulance service for free. That's what a mall can do for ya', and Rockford missed the boat there. Oh well.

Kudos to Pat Curran, however, for trying to do something about it. At last week's city council meeting, Curran encouraged colleagues to participate in a budget discussion during a special committee meeting, set for two hours before Monday's council meeting so as not to interfere with other committee schedules.

Nancy Johnson was the only other Finance & Personnel Committee member to show up on time, so hats off to her as well. I would be remiss if I didn't throw Carl Wasco, Frank Beach and Jeff Holt high-fives for giving a shit, too, but their interest was in vain.

Unfortunately, according to my sources, Curran and Johnson's presence wasn't enough to constitute a quorum, so these aldermen, along with interested citizens, the press and about a dozen staffers and administrators (who are paid by taxpayers for their time), sat twiddling their thumbs for an hour before Doug Mark graced everyone with his presence so the party could begin.

I guess his employer, the Metrocentre, doesn't feel the city's millions in contributions warrant letting an alderman work on city business. By the time Mark arrived, the non-F&P members had to leave for their own committee meetings, so the whole purpose of meeting at 4 was a complete wash. I'll bet Curran was pissed, and rightly so. But hey, at least Mark showed up.

From what I've been told, Vic Bell and Linda McNeely (also F&P Committee members) apparently had better things to do than discuss how they're gonna get out of the $8,000,000 mess they helped put the city in. No kudos or high-fives for these two, only bitch-slaps. McNeely is only around to be a pain in Larry's ass (probably on behalf of Doug Scott and/or Charles Box), and Bell is a short-timer, so what do they care? They apparently don't.

By the way, Ann Thompson didn't even set foot in city hall Monday. Probably a bad eyebrow day. Jesus, what a horror show.

Anyway, not surprisingly, I'm guessing little or nothing was accomplished during the committee meeting, because nothing was accomplished at city council either.

I'm getting the feeling most aldermen would rather keep putting this off and go to their little caucus-orgies on Monday nights instead. After Mr. Sammul prattled on forever about the dry nuances of ambulance costs, councilmen seemed to have had enough for one night.

Two weeks before the drop-dead date to pass a budget, none of them felt like talking about it, so they just put it off for yet another week. They claimed they wanted more time to review the "new" information, but they really just needed a fucking drink.

For that, I can't blame them, but maybe Patrick Hayes should draft a new council rule to allow bar service in chambers. I'm not sure that even tea-totaler Beach could resist the thought of Julia Valdez reaching blackout-point, taking on her true black widow persona in some sort of ritualistic dance on the mayor's desk. I won't even get into the Tijuana performance I imagine her putting on with the gavel. You don't wanna know.

At any rate, Curran was the only alderman with the balls to essentially say, "Hey, doubling ambulance charges just isn't right if all we're gonna get is happy fire fighters and a few re-elected aldermen."

By the time the council is done with them, IAFF local 413 may realize they have a premature ejaculation problem once aldermen come to the realization they just don't have the luxury of putting four brave souls on every engine right now. Now the union is stuck with Doug Block.

Even if the city were to solve the budget crunch and wind up with some huge hypothetical surplus, you'd better believe Morrissey will cut crews now, no matter what. Why? 'Cause it makes more sense to spend the money on something we truly need. Oh yeah, and I suppose going against Larry didn't help their cause either. Block may have peaked too early as well, but we'll see.

I love, respect and admire our men and women who rush to our aid on our blackest days, but c'mon...We do NOT need 4 of you on every fire truck when multiple companies can readily respond. Regardless of EJ Dilonardo's propaganda, 3 fire fighters is the norm. Do your research. I did. The only people who buy into this 4-man nonsense are the ones who've never been outside of Rockford.

Between having to shitcan his buddy Adam Smith and having fire fighters endorse Block, Larry had a hard week, but I expect he'll bounce back before election day. Block has a clear edge at the moment, and plenty more opportunities to criticize the administration, but three weeks is an eternity during a campaign. Anything can happen.

C'mon, people, this is gonna be fun to watch, one way or another! Pour some scotch, spark a fattie and watch the show.

With their boy Block posing a serious threat now, I suspect Democrats will dig their heels in on the 4-man issue, but I think Republicans (who don't really have a dog in the fight) will side with Morrissey. Afterall, to them, an independent is better than a Democrat.

P.S.
Your prayers for Jim Powers and his family would be appreciated. Lord knows I haven't always agreed with him, but I've never doubted his integrity or his love for the Forest City. Thanks for your service, Colonel. It is appreciated. God bless.

OK, I was wrong - Firefighters to endorse Block for mayor

There, I said it.

Tomorrow at 1 p.m., the IAFF will endorse Doug Block for mayor despite my speculation they'd stick with Morrissey, who was the frontrunner until today.

As I noted earlier, Morrissey took a big hit today after all of this Adam Smith business. Then again, aldermen were probably going to cut Smith anyway, so they just let Morrissey do it for himself like a big boy.

Smith-gate, in my estimation, is probably enough to give Block an edge in any poll more scientific than the one you see on this page.

Speaking of which, c'mon, Jesus. You've probably already gotten more votes on this page than you'll get on election day. I hope your friends are at least taking the time to read this stuff. Pay attention, son.

While it may be little more than a joke to you that you're running for mayor, this is your ultimate canvas - and I don't see you paintin' shit. Where's this alleged artist, comedian, musician you claim to be? I know you don't expect to win, but at least have some fucking fun with it and make a statement that won't shame your mother. You may never get another opportunity like this.

The Patriot has spoken and it is so.

Morrissey caves to pressure over Smith raise

Days after defending the salary increase extended to Adam Smith, Mayor Morrissey did a 180 today, "accepting" Smith's resignation under tremendous political pressure resulting from the unpopular raise.

If I know Doug Block, we're gonna be hearing about some other salary increases very shortly.

Frankly, I'm surprised Morrissey crumbled on this. He's obviously been viewing all the reader comments on the Register Star's website.

I think he could have diffused the situation by better articulating the fact that the raise was issued last year and that the $95,000 is a bargain considering Smith's alleged credentials, plus the millions of dollars worth of results he's allegedly delivered. To save face, Larry should have stood by Smith. This was a huge bungle as far as the mayor's campaign is concerned.

There's blood in the water now. Larry's in big trouble.

Harmon makes surprisingly strong showing in debate

After having watched the Register Star debate in its entirety, it's clear Larry Morrissey recognizes his only real opponent in the race right now is Doug Block. He went on the offensive several times, challenging Block to think as a mayor, not as a union rep, and to publicly acknowledge that the union needs to make concessions or accept changes for the sake of the city's fiscal health. Well played, Mr. Mayor.

The problem with this two-way race is that John Harmon has far more interesting things to say than Block does, but Block has the bruised legs of the police union to keep him in the press.

If, as I've predicted, the fire fighter union will be appeased (they're VERY happy if they keep four men on an engine), the police union may be alone in supporting Block. Block would do the same for the fire fighters, but as I've noted, the fire fighters know Larry's bound to win. They know it may not bode well if they go against him now.

If the police union wants to get the public on its side, it needs to start doing something about the crime. YOU are the ones I see driving past open-air drug markets. YOU are the ones I see bullshitting with your buddies in the parking lots. YOU are the ones I see turning on your cherries just to go through the red lights. YOU are the ones in MY rear-view mirror when you ought to be ridding the streets of the filth that threatens my family's safety. Don't fucking talk to me about the mayor or the chief. They can't be blamed for your inaction. Start making a difference and people will care more about what you have to say.

Harmon presented a fairly strong case for change and actually seems to have a logical, no-nonsense plan to cut spending. He's a conservative, and I have to admit that might do the city some good right now. It's been a long time.

His platform also seems to have an emphasis on creating jobs. Not sure how he plans to do that, but he's correct in that jobs would start healing some of the city's other ills, like poverty and crime. While Larry's emphasis seems to be education, jobs make at least as much sense. It's a reasonable priority, and one that a lot of unemployed folks might be interested in. This is easier said than done, though, so I'd like to hear more about his plan to make those jobs available ASAP.

It's important to note, however, that Harmon isn't picky about what types of jobs there are. Who knows. He could be right. Maybe we've been setting our sights too high. Baby steps first. On the other hand, I shudder to think about all the pig-slaughtering facilities, ethanol plants and environmental catastrophes this approach might welcome.

Fuck. I dunno. At the moment, I'm not unemployed, for which I'm very thankful. But because I do have a job and am able to pay my bills, I can't speak for the unemployed folks as to what sort of job they would or wouldn't take. My worry about bringing in these shit-jobs as a short-term fix is that we'll be stuck with them in better times.

While there are plenty of things he'd do differently, I like that Harmon praised Larry for the things he's gotten right. If I know Harmon at all, that was probably a difficult thing to do, but it showed some class.

As I've stated before, Harmon's just not a factor in the race, yet, but I'm starting to like the guy. That's saying a lot, because I usually think he's a complete bastard and I don't like the shitheels he hangs out with, truly.

As a Republican, its an uphill battle for him in a Democratic city. To have any chance, he's gonna need to keep the anti-Democrat rhetoric toned down - not an easy task for him - because he's gonna need a lot of their votes to have any chance. I also have doubts as to how strongly Jan Klaas at GOP HQ will want to support him financially.

In short, I guess I'm just a little disappointed Block is posing the biggest threat to Morrissey, because from what I've seen, Harmon clearly deserves that distinction. I hope the press will start paying a little more attention to him instead of just giving Block all the free campaign spots.

I'll probably wait until the last minute, or the maybe the last week, before I make any sort of painful endorsement (and I do realize that counts for nothing, because who the fuck am I?), but for those looking for a mayor who will trim the fat, I think Harmon's your guy.

Aldermen hope lots of rich people get hurt this year

At the City Council meeting last night, aldermen won a Fire Department popularity contest by nixing Mayor Morrissey's plan to reduce fire crews from four to three men on every truck.

Well, that's what the news will report, but it all could change in a week after aldermen are done licking their bellies for the TV cameras.

It's great news for the handful of people who'll actually need a fire extinguished this year, but the other 80 percent of the department's calls are for ambulance service.

***"If you vote Yes right now, we'll include a special bonus: Dial 9-1-1 for an ambulance and we'll also send a fully-loaded, shiny, red firetruck - whether you need it or not! (Fire truck mandatory. You will be billed.)"***

How can the city afford to keep four fire fighters on every engine? It can't. Instead, the taxpayers will be expected to pay for it every time an ambulance driver farts.

Folks, these aldermen are essentially saying, "If the 'people' insist on four-per-truck, then we'll reach so deep into their pockets for ambulance calls that they'll actually think twice about wanting to live before dialing."

This careless move by councilmen appeases those who fear death will rape them in the night if only three firemen bounce off a firetruck when some weekend drunkard sets his picnic table on fire during the local NAMBLA chapter's solstice BBQ.

For the record, I received an invitation to the BBQ, but declined. As an excuse, I spun some web of deceit involving a prior commitment in the form of a speaking engagement at a small New England private college, which would demand a rigorous regimen of heterosexual coitus with virgins of legal age.

Anyway, according to Finance Department figures, under the aldermanic plan, a bare-bones ambulance call would start ticking at $775. Right now, it's $375.

Given the economy we're faced with - and remember, Rockford's unemployment and poverty levels are especially high - collecting these bills is a pipe dream at best. As for what's in the pipe aldermen are passing, I'd guess it's some combination of crack, heroin, meth and Sani-Flush, but I can't be sure until I hear back from the lab.

As an educated man of modest income, I know that the difference between a $775 bill and a $375 bill is that the $375 bill might actually get paid. This is not Naperville, even if we have a river-walk paved with the gold teeth of hard-working people who can't afford an emergency right now.

Then what is the city gonna do? They'll waste tax dollars sicking Patrick Hayes' sweaty minions (from what I understand, lawyers make a good living) on these unfortunates for money they simply don't have.

These aren't the lifelong leeches-on-the-system the more heartless among us prefer to imagine. These are good people having a bad time, and I've been there, boy.

Simply put, aldermen are just trying to look like heroes until after they're re-elected. By the time their solution turns out to be a new problem for the general fund, we'll already be stuck with them all over again.

I'm expecting Larry to come out swinging against this proposal. I think his position, more or less, will be: "Aldermen want to charge you twice as much when you need the city most. By the way, four firemen per truck is still pretty wasteful."

I think he's got a good chance of building enough support in the next week to seriously challenge this not-so-well-thought-out plan when it comes up for a vote. Then, somehow, it'll be more appropriate to blame the mayor for reduced manning. The aldermen can't lose, unless they open their mouths.

I still think there's a good chance my earlier prediction about the outcome of this is on the mark. A lot can happen between now and the next City Council meeting, and Larry tends to be able to whip up the votes for what he wants. He's a clear favorite, and I still say the status quo won't want to burn any bridges when it gets down to it.

When all is said and done, I still say the fire crews will be cut to three. After today, the deck is stacked against my prediction of the fire fighter union endorsing Morrissey, but they also have to recognize the likelihood of his re-election. It's a good wager, and I'm all in. I think they know their endorsement isn't enough to give Doug Block an edge. For now, I stand by my prediction.

If I'm wrong, send me an ambulance bill.

Rockford's city fathers to perform coathanger-abortion of employees - SuperBlock nowhere to be found

I'm still nursing a state-of-the-city-hangover, but as those of us with "true grit" will acknowledge, there's no better cure than the hair of the dog that bit you.

It's about 5 a.m. and I'm celebrating - well, the kind of somber celebration one would allow in memory of a friend who's passed -because tonight, the city's alpha males and females will roll in shit when when life as city employees know it will forever be altered as a direct result of wasteful spending while the gettin' was good.

Tonight, the proposed budget comes before the full City Council. City Hall will stink of wet, mangy mutts as the aldermen who've allowed this mess to happen squirm and cower to be thrown a re-election bone. They can blame Morrissey all they want, but remember that they went along with all of it.

Especially considering that Larry's an Independent, you'd expect that Democrats and Republicans would have been doing their homework to keep him honest, but they obviously haven't. As one regular caller to WNTA would say, "Get rid of the bums!"

We're talking about a bunch of political hobbyists who are more concerned about status and throwing their weight around than doing the jobs they're charged with. They share in the blame for the failed expectations of the Morrissey administration, and so do we for that matter.

This mayoral election, despite Morrissey's emphasis on education, will be decided on the issue of public safety. That's what, from the beginning, made Doug Block the front runner to challenge the incumbent.

John Harmon is not a factor in the race and Jesus Correa just needs to take his egocentric art project back to his bedroom. I think it's fair to say both gentlemen are barely tolerated, even by their friends.

Aldermen have allowed Morrissey to run rampant with development funds, which has effectively raped the general fund to benefit developers who hardly need the breaks. And how is Rockford any better for these "investments?" Nothing I've seen supports the notion that TIF benefits anyone but property mongers.

Instead of taking the mayor to task for misuse of taxpayer dollars, aldermen are going to go along with cuts to the level of service Rockfordians pay too handsomely for - with a real, human cost - just so they can later claim balancing the budget as a victory.

You can't lay all the blame on Larry. Despite failure, at least he tried to do something. I'm beginning to think he might be the best one to get us out of this. It's kinda like how G.W. won re-election on the notion that we shouldn't change commanders-in-chief at wartime. Then again, we were probably wrong in that "choice."

Simply put, if Doug Block thinks he can manage to fill an $8 million budget hole without touching public safety, now's the time to for him to speak up. You can point to Adam Smith-types all you want, but the problem is much bigger than a handful of $100k jobs. Where, Mr. Block, do you propose to pull $8 million from the 30 percent of the city budget not directly attributable to public safety? Do you even recognize how we came to be in this awkward, prone position? Seriously, Dude, I hope you have more to say than, "Protect union jobs."

It's 2009 in Rockford, and it's still appropriate for residents to hang their heads in shame. Next year's looking no better and the Forest City isn't likely to see significant change in the next four years, despite having sons of Illinois in high places nationally. Remember, we're still the people who re-elected Blago, but only because the alternative was that allegedly "medicated nutcase," Judy Baar Topinka.

As my father once quipped, "Rockford is the asshole of Illinois." He was absolutely right then, and it still holds true, unfortunately. Like it or not, of the candidates we have, I think Larry best recognizes Rockford's history of mediocity, which is the first step to at least upgrading Rockford to taint-status.

First things first - the basics. There's some validity - in real dollars - to Larry's priority of decreasing truancy. As he noted during his annual campaign address last week, companies don't choose to locate in communities with great fire departments. They choose to locate in communities where their children can get a decent education. I think it's a crusade that makes sense.

Again, Mr. Block, where do you stand on issues that do not directly involve the unions? What about the rest of Rockford? Gotham City needs a hero. Take the union-cock out of your mouth and spit out a couple solutions. Otherwise, just shut up and go play with Jesus Correa in Prozac-land.

Big surprise - Police union endorses one of its own for mayor

You know, I figured it was a foregone conclusion the PB&PA was backing Doug Block, who served as a labor rep for the union until he won the Democratic mayoral primary last month. Still, the union president, Aurelio Delarosa, felt the need to issue a press release stating what everyone already knew.

Wanna know why that's gonna bite the PBPA in the ass? The Morrissey administration is still in control of the budget. Delarosa has now weakened his union's position.

At least EJ Dilonardo, president of the fire union, has the smarts to dangle his union's endorsement in front of incumbent Morrissey. Dilonardo's asking price: Maintain minimum staffing of four firefighters on every truck.

Public safety represents about 70 percent of the general fund, so this will be a tough sell. Friend, you'd better believe cuts are gonna be made in public safety.

With the PBPA's premature and unnecessary endorsement, I'd wager Morrissey will bitch-slap them when the budget is passed this month, and in arbitration. That'll give Larry some room to work with the Fire Department.

It'll be interesting to see how the firefighters' endorsement will play out.

My prediction: The IAFF local will endorse Morrissey, despite "temporary" reduced minimum staffing. Morrissey isn't gonna budge on that. He'll basically say four men on every truck is a luxury, not a necessity. In its endorsement, the IAFF will concede that it must share in the sacrifices we're all having to make. They will pledge to maintain the department's high level of excellence while we ride out this economic shitstorm. In exchange, Morrissey will pledge to restore four men per truck as soon as the city's back in the black.

Why the IAFF won't endorse Block: Morrissey will easily win re-election, for good or ill.

On the other hand, Dilonardo is listed as a supporter on Block's campaign site. Regardless, I'll stand by my prediction.

With Doug Block in chambers, Democratic aldermen take shots at Morrissey

Another interesting pair I noticed at this week's city council meeting was Democratic mayoral candidate Doug Block and firefighter union president E.J. Dilonardo glowering together in the gallery.

Doug was the victor in the Democratic mayoral primary last week, at which time he removed himself from duties as a police union negotiator. But make no mistake - he's still representing the union's interests.

Despite the hundreds of members in the fire and police unions, Mayor Morrissey raised an interesting point when he noted many of the city's fire and police personnel live outside the city limits. He seemed to be saying: "If you don't like me, tough shit. You can't even vote me out."

While that may be true to an extent, in the end, citizens want to know they're protected. Public safety will be the No. 1 issue in the mayoral election. The unions will make sure of it, and they know how to get their own propaganda out, just like the Morrissey administration.

Late last year, Joe Bruscato's victory over Chuck Prorok in the state's attorney's race came as a bit of a surprise to some, but not me. I think the police union's endorsement of Bruscato made the difference in that contest.

When it was announced, Prorok responded by prattling on about how it wasn't appropriate for Bruscato to accept the endorsement, but he would have taken it in a second if the shoe was on the other foot. In the end, folks decided to shake the last Logli-remnants from the office.

Since the election, Prorok also applied for a judgeship, but was beaten out again.

Interestingly, prior to running for state's attorney, Bruscato worked labor negotiations on behalf of the city. I saw the endorsement coming the very day Joe announced his candidacy, because the police union's Aurelio Delarosa was pictured standing beside Bruscato in The Rock River Times.

If Block is elected, my guess is his first order of business would be to show Police Chief Chet Epperson the door. Beyond that, it's not clear yet what his vision is for the rest of Rockford.

Larry Morrissey's war chest dwarfs Block's campaign funds, but the type of campaign he'll run won't run on money - It'll run on fear.

Anyone who's followed city government in recent months has seen Dilonardo appeal directly to Mayor Morrissey to not reduce minimum staffing levels on fire trucks as a cost-saving measure. We've already begun to hear the grim, worst-case scenarios of falling skies resulting from the police and fire departments having to share in the sacrifices the rest of us are making in this economy.

That being said, Rod Lashock has had some interesting things to say at council meetings recently. Lashock is a city employee whose wife is running for alderman. He's been trying to convince aldermen to ask Mayor Morrissey what happened to the general fund balance accumulated in previous years - tens of millions of dollars that could come in handy right now. From what I can tell, aldermen haven't been listening.

Dilonardo also began to pick at that rainy-day-fund-scab in recent weeks, and I think they need to keep pushing the issue. Where is the money?

Mayor Morrissey had a particularly difficult night March 2. Now that a Democratic mayoral candidate has been decided, Democrats wasted no time before starting to throw stones at Morrissey.

Carl Wasco bitched about how city staff told him he didn't know what he was talking about, but I think they'd probably be right. In any case, Wasco's tirade about the incident was directed at the administration.

Ann Thompson-Kelly drilled the mayor a new one, too, because she feels he's not making much of an effort to seal a deal that would bring a huge development to the west side. Hours earlier, Block issued a press release arguing the same point, so it's clear Thompson-Kelly was just spinning things for the Democratic mayoral hopeful.

Linda McNeely? Of course, she levied some criticisms, too, but she doesn't limit that to election seasons, so I'll let her slide. It's truly been a treat to see everyone on the council roll their eyes when Linda takes the floor, because she's consistently a thorn in Morrissey's side.

By the way, did anyone snap a shot of Epperson and Delarosa shaking hands during the Distinguished Service Medal presentation? Priceless. That awkward exchange even had me cringing.

Mark Bonne was also seen at the meeting Monday night. He's been whoring his face anywhere TV cameras go, so that came as little surprise. More on his his story another time.