The Element: Boo-hoo, my pussy hurts

What kind of a thankless leech can find a reason to complain about being handed $50,000 in public funds to beat a horse most Rockfordians have no interest in riding? Read on.

Is this Ed McCollough hack, a Morrissey contributor, rubbing anybody else the wrong way with his whining, while being paid $48,000 a year?

Seems to me that tax dollars given to downtown groups like the Element and River District would go a lot farther if these groups were led by people who didn't require salaries to pretend to give a shit.

Wouldn't it be great if creative, artistic folks who value downtown would take on that role for free, just because they care? I'm willing to bet there are plenty of passionate, talented young people who'd be willing to lead the charge. Jesus Correa wasn't mayoral material (nor is Morrissey, for that matter), but I wish Larry had taken my advice to acknowledge what Jesus does have to offer. Mr. Correa should have McCollough's job, and I'd be willing to wager he'd do it for free, or for a small stipend, and do it better.

The problem with the Element is that it's being led by the corporate likes of McCollough and Ron Clewer. While part of me admires Clewer for his past involvement with NAT, I can't ignore that he's stooped to being a part of William Charles now. Seriously, for all the money Billy Chuck makes off of this city for its piss-poor roads, where are the philanthropic contributions to such groups by Rockford (Loves Park, more accurately) Blacktop?

Okay, here's what the local media had to say about the Element getting 50k.

WREX proclaimed, "The Element loses thousands of dollars in funding." How do they figure a $50,000 handout is a loss? Granted, the Element once hoped for $75,000, then $60,000 after someone reminded them the city is broke. I'm sure all the unemployed people who are unwelcome in downtown establishments feel your pain, Ed, but go fuck yourself.

WREX's story quoted McCollough: "I simply don't understand it. You have an organization that's been successful in fulfilling its mission, in being accountable, collaborating and helping to run a great event like Friday Night Flicks. And then you just arbitrarily cut them."

Obviously, McCollough didn't get the memo that taxpayers are tapped out, but he hasn't offered to cut his own frivolous salary. Also, Ed, most people have either a DVD player or VCR, which don't drain public funds to watch 30-year-old movies.

WIFR ignorantly reported that "Aldermen approved taking 10-thousand dollars from another downtown organization to help pay for (On the Waterfront) security costs."

No such allocation was made of the 10k cut from the Element, and they'll probably get that money later anyway when it's discovered OTW is not an eligible TIF expense. But it's cute when TV people try to act smart by reporting falsehoods.

As the old SNL character Fernando would say, "It's better to look good than to feel good." Or, as Don Henley noted, "I just have to look good, I don't have to be clear."

TV news is about looking good, not about delivering factual information, but print isn't much better, as proven by RRStar, which stated the Element's budget had been "slashed," while ignoring who really lost in the deal.

I'm not sure why it wasn't in the print edition, but RRT did report on its site that the money came from the 7th St. TIF. Why the fuck is midtown having to pay for a pet project downtown?

I've evaded the Monday night regulars (mostly because I owe them money for deeply betting the judge would rule against the fire union recently), but as I watched Monday night's meeting, I was actually surprised by how much attention aldermen gave to this subject. Silent, however, was the alderman whose TIF was being raped to fund the Element. It's pretty sad when aldermen from other wards have to try to defend the 11th ward's TIF district because midtown's own alderman won't do so. In the end, Karen Elyea didn't care, so why should they? It went through, and the element has NOTHING to complain about, so zip it, Ed. Count your blessings.

A week before, Elyea stood up and had a mini-tantrum over a layover of the Element's funding request, oblivious to the council rules that even a layman knows. To me, that suggests she promised someone the request would be granted that night, because she wouldn't stand in the way of pouring dollars out of her ward into another-as though she has ANY clout. It makes one wonder where her heart really is, because it certainly isn't in the 11th ward that unwisely elected her. I'm not sure which is more hilarious: when she opens her mouth, or when she squirms like a child waiting for each meeting to end.

As I watch the meetings, while she sits there with a blank stare, I swear I can actually see a cupcake in a comic think-bubble next to her head. It would be funny if it wasn't such a sad outrage.

OK, so as not to be just some jaded critic, let me offer a suggestion, even if it's not directly pertinent to the Element.

The new RAVE Authority seems to be a major improvement over the Metrocentre do-nothings, and I applaud the private management that's being given an opportunity now. While Davis Park is too small for such events, it wasn't so long ago that major concert tours like Metallica and Lollapalooza landed at the fairgrounds in Pecatonica. That was pretty fucking huge. I hope the new Metrocentre management will consider taking advantage of that resource for more concerts that may otherwise ignore our area. Sure, it's in Pec, but they could still be Metrocentre events, from which Rockford would benefit. Just a thought.

Frank Beach's pipe dream, Ted Biondo's next legal nightmare, midtown meltdown

Okie dokie, let's get right to it. Lots of ground to cover in little time. The fellas are all here, lingering drunkenly after tonight's city council meeting and I've got some bets to make with these slobs before morning. Tomorrow a judge will decide whether to step in and keep a doomed fire station open, and I've got tall money riding on my prediction that the court will not intervene here. Then, Larry will put the hernia squeeze on the union's balls to accept one less man on every truck. The crowd here at the compound bets with their hearts, not their heads, and I'm going to rape their wallets. Enough about that for now, though.

Frank Beach, who can be identified by the layman as some sort of Al Pacino/Penguin (think Batman) hybrid, is a man who wishes the world was a perfect place. If Rockford had a shore, "Beach Beach" would be free of sex, drugs, swearing, alcohol, Rap/Hip-Hop, gambling, cigarettes, nudity and all other things the Bible specifically rejects. Hell, sand would probably be outlawed, too. He's completely unrealistic, but I still can't bring myself to dislike him.

Tonight, he suggested that everyone on the city's payroll voluntarily take a 5% pay cut so that no fire station would have to close and no jobs would be lost. What a fucking fantasy. Sorry, Frank. I don't think Jesus believes in Santa Clause and I highly doubt many would voluntarily take a cut when their own jobs aren't even in jeopardy.

All things considered, it would be more than just 5% for those non-union folks who've already accepted decreases/furloughs the last couple years. I doubt these people feel particularly inclined to take another hit for fire fighters who did nothing when unrepresented employees were losing their jobs.

No, my prediction is the union will have a hard day tomorrow, and the mayor will at least act like he's proceeding with closing two stations, but he's really just after one less man per truck. That's not to say I think it's right, because there are plenty of other places to find savings. This one is just a personal vendetta that Larry's not gonna give up on.

As a child, I think, he must have been picked on by guys who grew up to be cops and firemen, but I'm no psychologist.

If you want your fire department to be spared, then don't believe the hype that Larry can close the stations without the consent of aldermen. That's only half true. There's PLENTY aldermen can do, but they're all too happy to do nothing and let others take the heat. Put pressure on them to do their homework to find other cuts that can be made. This has EVERYTHING to do with serving the citizens, which is what they were elected to do. Don't leave it up to Larry and EJ playing Rock-em-Sock-em-Robots. Make the rest of the bastards earn their keep by involving the voters!

Beyond the station closure loophole Larry's clasping tightly in his limp hand, the fire fighters' contract ensures there's no danger of smaller crew sizes. That is, unless the union agrees to it, which I don't foresee.

On a related note, Ted Biondo has once again shown his true Morrissey rainbow colors, threatening that the city will levy a new utility tax if a judge forces the stations to remain open in what Ted perceives to be a sort of unfunded mandate. Biondo, by way of Larry and rrstar, has pitted the fire fighters against the tax payers who love them.

BTW, isn't Ted running for county board? What the hell is he doing writing for a newspaper? Am I the only one who finds that just a little shady? Many moons ago, when I lived in another state, there was a TV newscaster who had to take a leave of absence from his station because he was running for office. It just seemed like the right thing to do, and I'm willing to bet the Democratic lawyers are gonna call Ted on it as November approaches. Ted is a magnet for poor legal advice and, through his column at the paper, he's setting himself up for more trouble, I suspect. Ted, join us real Patriot bloggers, not the pathetic Morrissey rag, if you want to get your ideas out there. Rrstar is not going to help your credibility. Ah well, maybe I'm just pissed no one is offering me a column.

Although the union is certainly looking out for its own interests, it's foolish to say the existing contract should be ignored. If I recall correctly, a new contract will be negotiated next year, so why doesn't Larry put his energy into working with the union for savings then? The way I see it, it's not right to close the fire stations, and it's not right to tell the union to throw out a contract that an arbitrator ordered.

But Larry insists on having his way, and he'll spare no taxpayer expense to get it.

Case in point: Tonight, the council threw midtown a bone by providing $30k from the 7th St. TIF, where the group has typically been funded from and has done a lot with very little. But I suspect the $30k is just because the mayor wanted to butter up the midtown folks to be OK with letting Larry's "Element" group rape the TIF next week to the tune of $75k, which basically boils down to more money going to the Metrocentre.

Essentially, Larry refuses to accept the failures of his beloved TIF program, particularly downtown, so he's gonna punish those with proven track records by looting the coffers they've worked so hard for during a long, tough stretch. Downtown, uber alles. After reading about the so-called "bar wars," I'm beginning to think that downtown is encumbered by too many uppity douchebags who deserve to go out of business for their Aryan vision of the city's core. As SRV once said, "I may be white, but I'm not stupid." This town needs a black mayor again. My guess is that Vic Bell has his eyes on that prize.

It will be interesting to see whether Ald. Elyea will make a stand for her ward's 7th St. TIF next week, or if she'll just continue to be a seat-warmer. Boy, the "bubble law" debacle really must have knocked her down a couple notches. But Larry's weak right now and it's time to strike, baby! Believe me, if you stand up to Larry now, it's gonna be much better received by both parties than the abortion misstep you took a few months ago. It may have earned you a minute of poorly timed press coverage, but this is a real opportunity to act in the interest of regular folks.

OK, I better get back to the War Room to get some wagers in writing before these fools suffer from tequila-induced memory loss. See you on the other side.

Take crooked aldermen down a notch; legalize drugs and prostitution

"I don't understand why prostitution is illegal. Selling is legal. Fucking is legal. So, why isn't it legal to sell fucking?" - George Carlin

Spring is in the air. I can tell because my allergies are awakening as my hibernation comes to an end.

It seems love is in the air, too, especially in the Broadway district where, apparently at the behest of Ald. Elyea, police have turned their attention from rounding up crack-whores to singling out the johns instead. They're the ones who can afford to throw money into the local corrupt justice system after all. Makes perfect sense for those who stand to make a buck, I suppose.

The Rockford Register Star, this town's version of Pravda for city government, has clearly signed on to the embarrass-the-johns initiative. Much to the Register Star's chagrin, one of its own reporters, Chris Green, was the subject of one such arrest for solicitation of a sexual act during the second of several recent prostitution details to take place in midtown.

As part of the police department's priority of arresting lonely men, the daily has seemingly also agreed to publish photos of the johns. If I was Linda Grist Cunningham, I'd make the department pay for that ink and space if they insist the photos be published, considering the police should have bigger fish to fry. Instead, those of us who subscribe to the paper are paying for it. The Star didn't implement this photo-publishing practice until the third wave of arrests, however, saving Green a smidgen of embarrassment. Poor bastard nonetheless.

So, who stands to benefit from the crackdown on street-level prostitution in the Broadway area? Glad you asked. Just a few blocks away, there are known establishments which cater to lonely men under the guise of "lingerie modeling" or "massage" parlors. These places never seem to get busted, do they? But we all know what goes on there. I wonder who the owners, and more importantly the silent partners, could be that police protection seems guaranteed. One former 11th Ward alderman was very closely tied to such an establishment. I hear that's even where he met his bride. Big surprise.

Also, by turning the focus away from arresting the drug-addicted prostitutes, who stands to benefit? Glad you asked that, too. Well, those who sell drugs would certainly benefit by keeping their customers out of jail.

Starting to connect the dots?

Considering the very serious and violent crimes we face in Rockford, is this what our police should be focusing their resources on? As they say, it's the world's oldest profession. You're never gonna put a dent in it as long as the human animal has instinctual desires. And, as for the ladies, let's not forget the need to survive.

Let's take a closer look as the long-standing tradition of prostitution in the 11th Ward. These ladies deserve to make a living, too. Most, if not all, are drug addicts, unfortunately. Still, they have no skills (or teeth) with which to get a "real" job. And let's get real. They have no opportunities to turn their lives around. Unless you'd like to shell out more taxes for social programs that won't work, just leave them and their customers the fuck alone. We've got bigger issues to solve.

Hell, I don't even have a problem with the drug trade in most respects. Let adults do what they will as long as no one else is getting hurt. On the other hand, those who peddle their poison to children, and use children to do so - well, they're a different story. That's about as low as you can get. Since police don't want to do anything about it, they need to step aside and look the other way while us parents take it into our own hands.

On that note, one of my daughters goes to Keith Country Day School and has VERY interesting things to say about what one local alderman is involved in. I'd encourage other parents who know what I'm talking about to contact me.

Fresh start means a new Elyea?

Since this blog started in the frigid cabin fever months, my frequency of posts has declined as the mercury has climbed, but that's to be expected. Here at the compound, we've been spending as much time outside as possible. Between the job, family, generally enjoying the outdoors and tending to my garden, I'm just too pooped to find someone to pick on everyday here.

But it's been awhile, and I'll give it a shot. Blame it on the rain.

For someone who had no balls as a county board member, Karen Elyea has sure been trying to swing a pair around in city hall.

Having been little more than a warm body in her board seat, she seems to be trying to redefine herself as someone who actually understands what's happening around her, even if she's still not a part of it.

A week ago, appearing to have grown weary of listening to the rest of the council participate in meaningful discussion about arts funding, Elyea raised her hand to be recognized, admittedly with the intention of calling the question to end the debate.

Shit like that may fly in the county board room, Sweetie, but the council doesn't play that way. You can't strut into city hall like a big shot with the reputation (or lack of one) you've earned on the board.

Sorry if you're already bored with the new gig, but please don't try to stand in the way of healthy discourse just because there's somewhere you'd rather be. Remember, you're free to leave at any time, and there are no hall monitors to issue detention slips as you make your escape.

I can imagine her now, looking at her watch and daydreaming about cupcakes through every meeting she's signed up for during her new term of office. The poor thing is bound to completely crack under the duress of boredom.

Also a week ago, when the council voted on the advisory resolution supporting a casino license, Elyea decided to pull an amendment out of her hippie bag to indicate that the city specifically supports a casino downtown, rather than the more likely I-90 region.

While I agree we need to draw people back into the heart of the city instead of away from it, this was just a futile motion that failed as miserably as it deserved.

Although Mayor Morrissey is all about downtown, you didn't score any points with him, because he doesn't want it. And if it means jobs and dollars, aldermen tend not to be picky about where the gambling den goes.

It certainly would have shown some nobility on behalf of your constituents if you'd suggested the casino be sited in your ward, but it made little sense to demand it be built downtown, whose aldermen weren't even supportive of your amendment. Ouch.

I truly hope Elyea is trying to do things right with a clean slate in her new job as alderman, but she needs to concentrate more on building relationships with the rest of the council before they'll take her seriously.

You're in Larry Land now, Ald. Elyea, and that's a long way from Christiansen County, Hughes or no Hughes. There's a whole new set of rules you need to learn and play by if you want to be effective. The Irishman will fill ya' in on a need-to-know basis, but I'd suggest making some other friends, too.

Your relationship with Jimbo can only get you so far, but remember he holds the kill switch, so you don't wanna turn your back on him.

To her credit, Karen has already spoken more in her few weeks on the council than in her years on the board. One of these days, she might even offer something meaningful if she applies herself.

Interested party steps forward for Dist. 11 County Board seat

Reader Don Mason dropped me a line today to acknowledge he's asking to be considered as Karen Elyea's (D-11) successor on the county board after Elyea was sworn in as a Rockford alderman last week.

Here's what he had to say:

Raoul:

I've submitted my name to both County Board Chairman Scott Christiansen and Democratic Central Committee Chairman Dan Lewandowski for consideration to fill the County Board District 11 vacancy created by the resignation of Karen Elyea.

Resumes have been sent to all of the Democratic Precinct Committeemen in District 11, to Chuck Sweeny at The Rockford Register Star, and to Frank Schier at The Rock River Times.

Some of my qualifications include:

1)Education (two Associate's degrees, a Bachelor's, a Doctorate, and post-Doctorate surgical training)

2)Entrepreneurial experience (including being awarded a United States patent)

3)Union experience (former member of Local 196 of the Musicians Union)

4)Community service (Steering Committee of Kishwaukee Corridor Weed and Seed; President of Northwest Midtown Neighborhood Association, also known as Now!Town)

5) Government experience: (Seven years on the Alden Township Planning Commission in McHenry County. Township planning commissions are extremely rare, but in my opinion lead to better land use planning - and Winnebago County could certainly use better land use planning. So I've written an article about how they work, and I've submitted it to The Rock River Times.)

My supporters for the District 11 appointment include Rockford Township Clerk Jeff Holt; 11th Ward Alderman Karen Elyea; and Deputy Director of Regional Planning and Economic Development, County of Winnebago, Jim Hughes.

Perhaps this new information will help to clear up some of the misunderstandings regarding the recent 11th Ward race.

Dr. Donald C. (Don) Mason

Threatened with a tantrum, council succombs to demand for raise in allowance

Trying to save face in front of an enraged citizenry, aldermen perpetrated the oldest confidence game in the book Monday night, with taxpayers as the mark (no pun intended).

Despite quick hands, the council gave the Metrocentre exactly what it requested.

Completely unreliable sources tell me Andres Sammul and Corey Pearson exchanged briefcases in an elevator after the meeting. The briefcase Pearson walked away with allegedly had $250,000 cash, while Sammul's case only had a crudely scribbled note on a strip club napkin that read, 'Thanks, Pops."

The council decided: "Aw, shucks. OK, we'll 'loan' you some more money for old times sake, but we can't keep doing this. I mean, what if my wife finds out?"

Well, the bitches (that is, we the taxpayers) did find out, but I'll bet a good number of folks around the horseshoe are glad to have kept it under wraps until after the elections.

There were whispers, just prior to the April 7 election, that the Metrocentre wouldn't last through June. Doug Block's camp was talking about it, but they never pushed it beyond the rumor stage.

Then again, it wasn't only Morrissey who'd stand to lose if Block brought it to the forefront. Plenty of Block's fellow Democrats share the blame with Larry, and that's my best guess as to why Block backed off.

So, what will we get to show for the latest $600,000 we'll never see again? Two new appointed committees adding more layers to the bureaucratic kangaroo court of city government. If all goes well, they may even get budgets of their own.

One committee will focus specifically on the Metrocentre, making sure the big orange problem child behaves while the city dangles the remaining $350,000 like a carrot on a stick.

The other committee will make sure the whip is cracked on the asses of the Coronado, On the Waterfront and others. Essentially, the city is pretending to be strict disciplinarians when it comes to taxpayer dollars, but their unwillingness once again to teach the Metrocentre Authority a hard lesson only proves they are pushovers.

Let 'em shut down for the rest of the year if they can't learn to run the place like a business. The only way to burn money that fast is on strippers and blow. The Metrocentre made lofty promises they did not deliver, and I've yet to hear any council member question the leadership over there.

I suspect that's because the MC board is led by the police chief's wife. Still, Pearson has always come across as a real punk and I suspect his salary far outweighs his actual contributions to the cause. I'll be curious to see what the new committee will have to say about the MC officers and command staff, if anything at all.

I finally got around to watching my tape from Thursday's county board meeting. When Karen Elyea announced it would be her last meeting, colleagues responded with a standing ovation.

After having conducted an unscientific, anonynous poll, Rockford Rhetoric learned most board members just seemed glad to see her go.

I'd wager Tuffy Quinonez is demanding the appointment as reparation after being scorned by Elyea in the Democratic primary for the 11th Ward city council seat, but my money's against him.

Jim Hughes has an especially heavy pimp-hand in the 11th Ward, and I suspect Tuffy is not on the Irishman's short list of flunkies to finish Elyea's term. I can't wait to see who he digs up.

Speaking of Hughes, a little bird told me an interesting story that this blog's Site Meter data appears to corroborate after I physically verified locations of several interesting publicly-funded IP addresses frequenting this site.

I'll save that for another day.

Report from a degenerate gambler

By now, you already know I cleaned up on the mayor's race. I just woke up a couple hours ago and am enjoying a three-martini breakfast. Tomorrow I collect what I wasn't able to Tuesday night. I expect resistance in a couple cases, so I've procured a private security agency to keep things civil.

By the way, the Yater is already paid for and waiting in San Juan, where we'll be united Saturday.

For all the barking the Blockheads did over the last month or so, they failed to even break the skin at the polls. Now get your fucking shine boxes.

Don't get me wrong, you won't find more critical coverage over the next four years than right here, so Larry-bashers are encouraged to stay tuned.

This will be the place new candidates are born, Patriots, so let's keep the dialogue going and take back city hall next time around. Hell, let's start our own Patriot Party.

The upset of the night: Useless Dan Conness managed to beat Pete MacKay for Rockford Township highway commissioner. I noticed Pete was running an awful lot of ads in the days before the race, but I never suspected he was in any trouble. Luckily, no one else thought Conness had a chance either, so I didn't lose anything on this race, except maybe faith in humanity. I vastly overestimated voter turnout, which I understand was only about 25%. Ouch. Pete's friends obviously stayed home Tuesday, and now look what's happened. The township has lost a friend and gained a fiend.

Those of you affected by the asphalt plant oughta be ashamed for allowing that to happen. Although many of you aren't in the city proper, my understanding is that you are in the township. If any of you really think Conness tried to stop the foul-smelling carcinogenic horror from coming to your neighborhood, think again. The same goes for your county board rep's. You've gotten what you deserve for your ignorance, you poor fools. See you in hell after a brief battle in the cancer ward. Morrissey was not your enemy, and Conness does not appear to have been your friend.

It occurred to me, however, that maybe John Harmon outsmarted everyone. If you'll recall, Harmon and a handful of others tried to oust MacKay by holding a caucus instead of a primary. The media actually took notice as it turned out, and no Republican had the balls to challenge Pete for the nomination. Then Harmon's closet buddy - Conness, a DINO - announced he was gonna run. Many laughed, including me, but Harmon and Conness are having a good chuckle now. Further proof of Harmon's political prowess, yes, but also evidence of what seems to be an exceedingly bitter nature.

Still, I'd like to spill a few with John. I'll bet he's one hell of a fun drunk. If only he could use his powers for good...

Betting against my heart - a guilty pleasure: The council is rid of Dapper Dan at least, but he'll be replaced by another dud in another ward, Karen Elyea. She who has the most yard signs wins, and that's how I was counting on the relatively uneducated 11th Ward to vote. My disdain for Elyea's plasticity and her apparent lack of any moral center nearly kept me from winning $1100 Tuesday night, but I wagered with my gut, not my heart. For what it's worth, I take little pleasure in having been right.

It was a bittersweet victory, but one that taught the part-time gambling rubes here at the compound an expensive lesson: Betting on who should win is folly.

Like the council with Conness, the county board will be rid of Elyea, but I shudder to think what kind of monster the likes of Doug Aurand will replace her with. For the liberals out there, you can take some comfort in knowing that at least it will be a real Democrat this time. Hopefully, they'll think about Mr. Latham for the seat. In any case, board Democrats will level the political landscape a bit with whomever replaces Elyea. They'll probably just move Jeff Polsean to the ward, since he can't seem to buy a seat anywhere else.

By the way, Democrat sources tell me they plan to vote in favor of Democratic-contributor Sunil Puri's special use permit at county board Thursday night. Whether Republicans plan to make it a partisan issue will be determined at the meeting. Republicans technically have enough votes to kill it should they choose, but I suspect there will be a lot of absences, so I'm not optimistic. Puri is smart enough to hedge his bets usually, but he was really counting on Democrats taking over the board in November, so Republicans could exact their revenge Thursday if they wanted to. I doubt they have the cajones, however.

One race I lost money on was township clerk. Overestimating voter turnout, as in MacKay's case, I had money on Diane Dal Pra Mitchell to keep her seat. Jeff Holt won that one, and I think the township will still be well-served, but it's obvious the Democrats really got the vote out in Rockford Township.

I really got beat up in the township races, but I ended up way ahead overall, so I can't complain. I lost a little by betting on Don Hall, who was challenging Mickey Goral for supervisor. I really hope Mr. Hall stays involved, because his political future is absolutely blinding. If he hasn't already, Hall needs to get together with another Patriot, Gen. John Borling, for some pointers. I think they'd get along famously.

Eli Nicolosi, you're a reader and I hold you personally accountable for the $350 I lost on your behalf in the trustee races! But I know you're good for it, and you also have a bright political future. We can work something out when I need a favor. Keep your chin up, kid, and remember who the real Patriots are.

You may or may not hear from me before my toes are in the sands of Puerto Rico this weekend, but you're all in my heart.

See you soon, Patriots.

Humping Block's leg pays off for Elyea?

Republican Karen Elyea, who seems to call herself a Democrat only as a matter of convenience and opportunity, has been laughing all the way to her campaign coffer, thanks to union contributions she's gotten by following Doug Block around like a puppy dog.

The local fire fighters' union contributed, because they apparently assumed she's pro-union, since they've undoubtedly seen her riding Block's coattails.

Likewise, IBEW, the Northwestern Illinois Building and Construction Trades Council, the iron workers, plasterers & cement masons and laborers have thrown financing Elyea's way.

"Civilian" contributors to her campaign include Republican county board member Randy Olson. Additionally, Elyea's campaign documents show that she hired former Republican county board member Chris K. Johnson's River District Catering for a fundraiser.

It appears to me Karen might do or say anything to get what she wants, but for the unions who hope she gets elected, she'll be your worst nightmare, because she's probably already forgotten you. You'll learn that she cares primarily about her own agenda, and unions don't likely factor into it. Sorry, Charlie.

Where are all the contributions from people in her ward who believe in her? That's easy: There aren't any. Not one.

Advice to Doug Block: Choose your friends more carefully, because everyone else in Rockford seems to know more about Elyea than you do, and she could be hurting your chances of being taken seriously. And don't be afraid to ask your PBPA members about drug charges against her in 2003, and whether they believe there's more to that.

Register Star profile of 11th Ward race

Well, based on what the three 11th Ward candidates had to say in the Register Star today, there is a clear choice: Independent James Bryan Latham.

Of the three, he's the only one that mentioned doing what is best for the ward.

For those of you who were at the Heartland forum, did anyone else think the bizarre manner in which "Democrat" Karen Elyea spoke was indicative of long-term buzz-chasing? I'm thinking she might have a closet freon-huffing habit, but I can't be sure. Maybe I'm just being paranoid, but I can't bring myself to trust this shifty chica. Sorry, Nurgle, I know you've gotta live with her. My condolences.

And I don't mean to insult a reader, honestly. Please understand that I don't care what someone does for a living.

No one knows better than me that not all of life's pleasures are legitimate. After all, my welcome mat says, "Come back with a warrant."

Hypothetically speaking, I would favor a candidate who'd get involved with the political system in order to change unjust laws. However, if that candidate were to engage in politics simply to corner a market in an area, I'd have a problem with that, especially if their business involved children. Luckily, there's no one like that around here, right?

Elyea's stated biggest issue in the race was just a simple rehash of Doug Block's platform, going as far as to actually say, "Now is the time to get back to the basics," a Block catch-phrase. Elyea's been humping lots of union legs to ride the Block coattails while the gettin' is good. But I suspect she'd pledge her loyalty to anyone who will help her get an elected job that pays $12,000, instead of the $7,500 one she has now on the county board.

Latham, 44, is the executive director of the Total Health Awareness Team, or THAT, president of the Midtown District Inc, and owner of Midtown Marketplace. Talk about a guy with his hand on the pulse of everything in the 11th Ward.

You can't deny drugs and prostitution are issues in that ward, and when the two mix, even worse problems emerge. While needle exchanges in the neighborhood may not be something for residents to brag about, the need for such a program is clearly justified there.

One might argue having a needle exchange in the the 11th Ward attracts the dope addicts to the neighborhood, but the simple fact is that the problem was already there. That's not to say there isn't some design behind why the drug markets appear to be tolerated in certain areas of the city.

Drug dealers and pimps seem to make sure subsidized cops don't disrupt their business as long as no shots are fired. Driving around the city, we all see areas obviously infested by the criminal element - and they appear to be permitted and even corralled within areas that nice, rich folks pretend don't exist.

In places like that, the cops seem to just drive by the obvious criminal activity being done out in the open. If they really wanted to establish a presence, they'd park their squad cars wherever the ne'er-do-wells gather. But if they did that, there's the possibility the crime would move to where those nice, rich people live instead, and we wouldn't want that.

Another independent candidate, Wade Hendrickson, targeted wasteful spending in City Hall as the big issue. Yes, that's a problem, but how will you adress the issues unique to the 11th Ward?

Simply stated, vote Latham.

Elyea plans to hoarde seats?

Sources are telling me Karen Elyea does not plan to step down from her County Board seat if elected to the City Council in April. She and sugardaddy Jim Hughes must feel awfully slick. Now she can be an ineffectual component of two governmental bodies!

I'm checking into this with the attorney general to see whether these two offices are really compatible.

"Stay tuned, stay off your knees, and death to the screwheads."

The straight 'dope' about the 11th Ward

Well, County Board member Karen Elyea vanquished former County Board member Tuffy Quinonez in the 11th Ward's Democratic primary for City Council. Jesus, talk about two exceedingly poor choices. Go ahead and search their names through the circuit clerk's online case files. I'll wait.

Note that Tuffy is a nickname. His real first name is Theophelo. Charges alleged battery, possession of controlled substances, etc. Folks allege Elyea is no better.

As recently as 2003, she was charged with alleged manufacturing/delivery of cannabis and sale of drug paraphernalia. Some would allege you can still walk into her store, and walk out with a variety of goodies from around the world, but I'm not into hippie stuff.

If you search the name of her live-in boyfriend, James Harnden, you'll see they're made for each other: There are several charges alleging DUI's, drugs, etc. Oh, it appears they might owe some folks money, too. In one case, in which Karen and James are named defendants, you'll notice her last name is spelled AYLEA, so who knows how many more 'typos' may be obscuring her in the system.

There are rumors of other alleged business ventures she's involved in, but if that's true, she must be keeping her distance and letting others do the gritty work. She does appear to try pushing what little political weight she has around, though.

Within a block of her place, someone appears to have exerted some influence to allegedly crush would-be retail competitors in the local market. One nearby store was closed down after it was discovered it was an alleged bodega.

The hammer also came down on another nearby store that may or may not have been offering a little friendly competition, but one can never be sure.

Frankly, I'm surprised Quinonez couldn't beat Elyea (a DINO, or Democrat in name only, as Chuck Sweeny would say) in a ward with such a high Hispanic concentration.

I'm betting Tuffy is pissed, to say the least, that Elyea ran against him after he helped her get elected to the county board, where she's consistently aligned herself with Republicans. So, although she seems to have much in common with Tuffy, she's significantly less loyal to her party's label.

It should be noted Elyea associates with the likes of John Harmon, a Republican former county board member now running for mayor, and Jim Hughes. Hughes, for a time, was a well-known Democrat, but now that his paycheck is signed by his Republican keepers, he's looks to be playing for the other side.

Just last night, while watching the city council telecast, the two DINO's could be seen sitting together. A banister obstructed the camera's view from the chest down, but with a little imagination, it appeared as though Elyea was jerking Hughes off in the gallery, metaphorically.

With only a couple independents challenging her in April to take Jeff Holt's seat, she unfortunately appears to be a shoe-in. From what I hear, Holt is backing her. I always thought he was brighter than that, but you learn something new everyday. Then again, I suppose Tuffy couldn't expect the endorsement after raising a big stink about Holt's residency after he'd already announced he wouldn't be seeking another term on the council. Talk about burning a bridge unnecessarily. That probably made the difference in the primary.

Honestly, I don't care what someone does for a living, and I believe many types of things ought to be legal, or decriminalized at the very least.

Karen and Tuffy are probably fun to party with, but they are not the sort of representation the 11th Ward needs. It looks to me like their only motives for seeking political office are to protect their personal interests.

But, that's par-for-course in the Forest City. You don't gotta love it, but it looks like we gotta live with it a while longer.