Report from a degenerate gambler

By now, you already know I cleaned up on the mayor's race. I just woke up a couple hours ago and am enjoying a three-martini breakfast. Tomorrow I collect what I wasn't able to Tuesday night. I expect resistance in a couple cases, so I've procured a private security agency to keep things civil.

By the way, the Yater is already paid for and waiting in San Juan, where we'll be united Saturday.

For all the barking the Blockheads did over the last month or so, they failed to even break the skin at the polls. Now get your fucking shine boxes.

Don't get me wrong, you won't find more critical coverage over the next four years than right here, so Larry-bashers are encouraged to stay tuned.

This will be the place new candidates are born, Patriots, so let's keep the dialogue going and take back city hall next time around. Hell, let's start our own Patriot Party.

The upset of the night: Useless Dan Conness managed to beat Pete MacKay for Rockford Township highway commissioner. I noticed Pete was running an awful lot of ads in the days before the race, but I never suspected he was in any trouble. Luckily, no one else thought Conness had a chance either, so I didn't lose anything on this race, except maybe faith in humanity. I vastly overestimated voter turnout, which I understand was only about 25%. Ouch. Pete's friends obviously stayed home Tuesday, and now look what's happened. The township has lost a friend and gained a fiend.

Those of you affected by the asphalt plant oughta be ashamed for allowing that to happen. Although many of you aren't in the city proper, my understanding is that you are in the township. If any of you really think Conness tried to stop the foul-smelling carcinogenic horror from coming to your neighborhood, think again. The same goes for your county board rep's. You've gotten what you deserve for your ignorance, you poor fools. See you in hell after a brief battle in the cancer ward. Morrissey was not your enemy, and Conness does not appear to have been your friend.

It occurred to me, however, that maybe John Harmon outsmarted everyone. If you'll recall, Harmon and a handful of others tried to oust MacKay by holding a caucus instead of a primary. The media actually took notice as it turned out, and no Republican had the balls to challenge Pete for the nomination. Then Harmon's closet buddy - Conness, a DINO - announced he was gonna run. Many laughed, including me, but Harmon and Conness are having a good chuckle now. Further proof of Harmon's political prowess, yes, but also evidence of what seems to be an exceedingly bitter nature.

Still, I'd like to spill a few with John. I'll bet he's one hell of a fun drunk. If only he could use his powers for good...

Betting against my heart - a guilty pleasure: The council is rid of Dapper Dan at least, but he'll be replaced by another dud in another ward, Karen Elyea. She who has the most yard signs wins, and that's how I was counting on the relatively uneducated 11th Ward to vote. My disdain for Elyea's plasticity and her apparent lack of any moral center nearly kept me from winning $1100 Tuesday night, but I wagered with my gut, not my heart. For what it's worth, I take little pleasure in having been right.

It was a bittersweet victory, but one that taught the part-time gambling rubes here at the compound an expensive lesson: Betting on who should win is folly.

Like the council with Conness, the county board will be rid of Elyea, but I shudder to think what kind of monster the likes of Doug Aurand will replace her with. For the liberals out there, you can take some comfort in knowing that at least it will be a real Democrat this time. Hopefully, they'll think about Mr. Latham for the seat. In any case, board Democrats will level the political landscape a bit with whomever replaces Elyea. They'll probably just move Jeff Polsean to the ward, since he can't seem to buy a seat anywhere else.

By the way, Democrat sources tell me they plan to vote in favor of Democratic-contributor Sunil Puri's special use permit at county board Thursday night. Whether Republicans plan to make it a partisan issue will be determined at the meeting. Republicans technically have enough votes to kill it should they choose, but I suspect there will be a lot of absences, so I'm not optimistic. Puri is smart enough to hedge his bets usually, but he was really counting on Democrats taking over the board in November, so Republicans could exact their revenge Thursday if they wanted to. I doubt they have the cajones, however.

One race I lost money on was township clerk. Overestimating voter turnout, as in MacKay's case, I had money on Diane Dal Pra Mitchell to keep her seat. Jeff Holt won that one, and I think the township will still be well-served, but it's obvious the Democrats really got the vote out in Rockford Township.

I really got beat up in the township races, but I ended up way ahead overall, so I can't complain. I lost a little by betting on Don Hall, who was challenging Mickey Goral for supervisor. I really hope Mr. Hall stays involved, because his political future is absolutely blinding. If he hasn't already, Hall needs to get together with another Patriot, Gen. John Borling, for some pointers. I think they'd get along famously.

Eli Nicolosi, you're a reader and I hold you personally accountable for the $350 I lost on your behalf in the trustee races! But I know you're good for it, and you also have a bright political future. We can work something out when I need a favor. Keep your chin up, kid, and remember who the real Patriots are.

You may or may not hear from me before my toes are in the sands of Puerto Rico this weekend, but you're all in my heart.

See you soon, Patriots.

Who I’m endorsing, and who I’ll actually vote for...

I'm gonna try to keep this as short as possible, because I'm not in the mood right now. As predicted, they started arriving shortly before 10AM today, already smelling like breweries, brandishing firearms and compelled to gamble on each of the local races. I'm sick of them already, but by the time the polls open in the morning, I'll get my second wind to carry me until all precincts have reported.

By the way, Mr. Nicolosi, I've got big money riding on you for a township spot. Don't let me down, kiddo. I'm told my oldest needs braces.

When the city council drinking game was finished this evening, an inexplicable lull came over the compound - the calm before the storm on election day, I suppose. Anyway, I'm taking this moment to deliver what I've promised.

April 7 will be a long night for those of us watching the local races. Some will celebrate victories, other will mourn defeats, and I expect to do a little of both.

We have a choice, fellow Patriots. The choice is whether we keep city hall in the hands of the lawyers, or give it to the cops - Not a comfortable decision to make, as both industries continue to cause significant amounts of grief in my own life.

There are, of course, two other candidates for mayor, but even before the Democratic primary was decided, it was clear the race would be between Block and incumbent Morrissey.

Jesus Correa is still plugging along, usually showing up for forums and debates when he’s invited. By the time this election’s done, Jesus might actually have learned quite a bit, but I don’t suspect we’ll see him run again in four years. However, I would wholeheartedly endorse Correa for a leadership position that will give him the resources to craft downtown into his inspired yet attainable vision.

I also liked his comments about the police. As he deftly noted, people fear cops whether they’ve done anything wrong or not. No one is happy to see a cop in their rear-view mirror, yet they’re never around when you need them, right?

Correa advocated for officers to actually get to know the residents of the communities they protect – an excellent idea. Too much time is spent driving around in squad cars instead of doing the legwork that makes a difference. Police need to build relationships with citizens if we’re gonna put a real dent in crime. Better yet, Jello Biafra once proposed that police officers should be elected by the neighborhoods they serve.

Lord knows the neighbors need someone to turn to when they find me pissing in their rose bushes and blasting a shotgun into the air at 5AM on a Sunday.

John Harmon, you’ve got a lot of wisdom and sensible ideas. During this campaign, you have been consistently stellar in identifying problems and presenting solutions. As far as my score sheet is concerned, you won every debate.

Comparing the cases presented by all four candidates, I hereby endorse John H. Harmon for mayor of Rockford, but that's not who I'll be voting for.

Unfortunately, John’s strengths are in politics, not in making friends. When you’re running as a Republican in a city of Democrats, you’ve already got an uphill battle. Add to that the fact that few in your own party support you and you’ve got, as Larry would say, a tough row to hoe.

John, I recommend you retire from running for office. Instead, you could keep your hand in things as a campaign consultant. Believe it or not, that actually might give folks like Jim Thacker something to worry about. Give it some serious thought. [Patriot’s note: I wrote this suggestion last night, prior to hearing Mr. Harmon mention such a possibility during today’s WNTA debate].

While Harmon, point for point, presented the strongest arguments to earn my endorsement, he simply cannot win, so my actual vote must be cast either for Larry or for Doug.

Doug is a well-liked guy. Considering that he worked internal affairs (not a popular position in the department), it's impressive that he has the full trust of Rockford's finest. And no matter what Larry dishes out, Block will be okay in my book, too.

However, I can’t ignore that he obviously has the interests of the police union at heart. His knowledge about other issues, quite frankly, is not up to snuff this time around. The problem, I think, is that Block’s candidacy is more about dethroning Larry than anything else. Beyond that, Doug doesn’t appear to have real plans yet to address the multitude of issues facing the city if he’s actually elected.

On the other hand, just about everyone who voted for Larry feels let down.

If we learned anything from the GW Bush debacle, however, choosing the guy you’d most like to do blow with while driving drunk isn’t always the best course of action. When it comes to that, there’s no question I’d rather party with Doug, but this is no Tijuana titty-bar.

At Block’s present level of fluency with the issues, I’m much more inclined to leave things in Larry’s hands right now, and I’ll grudgingly cast my vote for Morrissey.

There you have it, for whatever it's worth.

This is a tighter race than Larry would like, but I predict he'll win it. I've got money on it in fact, and I'm determined to fleece the derelicts in my living room who think Block has the edge.

If Morrissey is re-elected, I'll be scrambling to collect an estimated $14,000 in winnings before I board a plane for San Juan Saturday. In which case, a new Reynolds Yater high performance longboard will be my first purchase once I hit the beach. The remainder will, of course, be spent on foolish endeavors I hope to remember later.

Hang loose, Patriots.

Charlie Box don't surf!

I promised an endorsement, while also acknowledging it shouldn't count for anything - because who the fuck am I, right? Regardless, as much as I spout off about these poor bastards running for mayor, I can't go limp now.

I will be voting, I'll have to make a choice and I will share it with you the night before I do so. I don't care to sway your vote. You have your own reasons and beliefs. I'll just tell you what decided it for me as best I can.

It might come late, but by the time you wake to go about your civic duty on Tuesday, The Patriot will have spoken.

I'm really trying to keep an open mind until the WNTA debate is over Monday. That'll be the last stand for all 4 gentlemen and I expect friends, political figures and strangers will start dropping by the compound sometime Monday morning, demanding to start the tailgate party.

Once I wake up Monday, there'll be no sleep until Wednesday. When I regain consciousness sometime Thursday or Friday, I'll lick my wounds and pack my bags for Puerto Rico. I'm leaving Saturday, but will stay connected through the miracle of the porn machine. Some friends are making a movie (not a porno) in San Juan and I wanna get some color before summer.It'll be a nice break. I need to get to the beach for a recharge every now and then. Normally, I head home to San Marcos, CA. Most of the family is out that way, and I like to do a little surfing when I can.

By the way, I highly recommend winter surfing on Lake Michigan when you can't get to an ocean.

But it's been too long since I've been to Puerto Rico and it'll be good to see old friends. Mid-April typically marks the end of peak surfing down there, but I'm hoping for some nice swell anyway. Then again, I might just stick around there to do some surfing when hurricane season starts in June.

We'll just have to see how long the local authorities will be tolerant of me before I have to make a hasty exit from the archipelago.

Fear not. We're in it together as we inherit whatever disaster we find ourselves stuck with April 8.

Take comfort in knowing we've got 4 years to make sure Dave Syverson gets his dick knocked in the dirt when he runs for mayor.

Block campaign begins to unravel

Just two or three weeks ago, Doug Block was having the best week ever. Could it be he peaked too early in the campaign? We shall see, because here in the home stretch, Mayor Morrissey is really pouring it on to swing the momentum in his own favor.

Larry convened what was apparently an invitation-only scandalfest for the media Tuesday at Forest Hills Country Club, just moments after he'd eaten lunch beside Block.

From what I understand, Larry showed members of the local press obscene text messages that none of them could possibly air or print. Why would he do this? Is it because his feelings were hurt?

I wouldn't count on it. He simply knows it'll make Block look like an ignorant union goon. Well, son Dan certainly looks like an ass, because this little thing could be enough to derail his dad's campaign, even though Doug cut Dan loose from the campaign a day later. The damage is already done, with less than a week to recover.

If we've learned anything from the Billy Carters and Roger Clintons of this world, Doug, it's that some family members oughta be mailed to Nepal during a campaign, and kept there if you're elected.

Larry's point: The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

Apparently, Larry wheeled out some other complaints about Block's supporters, but they had little, if anything, to do with Doug himself. I think Larry really just wanted an excuse for giving the media hardons by confiding in them the contents of the text message, so as to perhaps manipulate the local press to put Block on the defensive, regardless of how silly it all is.

As I understand it, and mentioned earlier, Doug and Larry apparently attended some sort of candidate luncheon at Forest Hills CC just before the private donkey show. Obviously, Larry wanted Doug to see the media filing in as the luncheon ended. Naturally, Doug would stick around to see what's up.

After Larry got the local press all spun into a frenzy behind closed doors, he turned them loose on Block, who was apparently waiting right outside for the ambush. Very calculated.

Chuck Sweeny's column today brought up another good point. Doug's been running an ad based on a Register Star article he obviously never finished reading. What's sad is that it's starting to appear that Doug doesn't even realize the claim in his ad is false.

I personally think Doug's a good guy, but that he's really not fluent in issues unrelated to the police. If he doesn't win this time around, he can become awfully strong in the next four years if he broadens his horizons.

Adding to Block's woes, I see Frank Schier threw his endorsement behind Morrissey. Not a surprise after Larry threw Schier a bone Monday by backing off on industrial zoning along the Kish. Both men got what they wanted.

But you know it's a close race when Larry actually needs TRRT's endorsement, and I'm willing to bet Block was hoping to get it himself. It's just that tight.

If you think it's ugly now, just wait to see what Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Monday will bring. Those are the days that will decide this race.

Now is the point in the campaign where Larry will reach deep into his substantial warchest to bury Block if at all possible. This week, you'll see the difference having lots of money makes, Doug.

I certainly hope that Mr. Block is a reader by now. I have some advice that may be of help in these last days before the election:

1. Doug McDuff is trying to get the two of you in a room together. Take that opportunity. Begin by offering a sincere, public apology for the conduct of some of your supporters. Make it short, but heartfelt. Then, say, "Now, let's talk about the issues."
   
2. No more TIF districts. John Harmon is absolutely correct in his assertion that they are a BIG source of debt. Give John a call. I have the feeling he'd be happy to brief you, because I'm sure he knows he can't win. Beating Larry is good enough for him any way he can get it. And don't be afraid to credit Jesus Correa with questioning the success of TIF in the case of Anderson Packaging. This is right up your alley, Doug, and it'll show voters you know about more than just union bullshit. This is a story about 167 loyal Anderson workers getting fucked right after the city gave them $1.1 million to expand and create new jobs, and Larry calls it a victory. Sure, Anderson will probably hire enough illegal aliens at low wages in order to live up to its end of the bargain of creating jobs, but a lot of good people got canned. Be outraged about it, because you oughta be.
3. Advocate for a casino downtown.
4. Get Rick Nielsen to endorse you.
5. Pledge to sell the IceHogs to a responsible local buyer if at all possible. Although you love the team, you should be opposed to city ownership. Do you suppose Dr. T and Craig could afford to buy them back now? Maybe it's just a pipe dream, but maybe not. Start making some calls and crunching some numbers, and undo an injustice done by Larry to the team you love.
   
6. Tie Morrissey family relations to Coppergate. The connection is there.
7. Draw attention to Ryan Brauns' connections to Morrissey while also being on the Board of Elections (not to mention consulting contract[s]). Talk about a fucking conflict.
8. Advocate for concealed carry. The county board has already shown its willingness. Pledge to work with them to educate the public on the facts and dispel the myths. Then, an advisory referendum will pass, which will put a little more pressure on the legislature.
9. Kill the riverwalk. That'll happen on its own once the casino is downtown, without having to go through people's backyards.
   
10. Change your position on removing the pedestrian mall. It's a good thing to get rid of it.

There's 10 to get ya started, Doug. If I see you using any of these recommendations in the next couple days, I'll be glad to offer further counsel.

The Patriot has spoken, and it is so.

I'm spent. Ruthlessly drunk. The kids are asleep and the wife is waiting. As my balls slap against her in a matter of moments, I'll be thinking about election day.

Ode to Jesus

Mr. Correa:

I watched the debate from the balcony of the Coronado Wednesday night, donning my Phantom of the Opera mask, and your mom can be proud of her son.

I agree with you 100% that downtown should resemble On the Waterfront at all times, which you've said at more than one debate. It's amazing what a few colored lights, delicious smells and the sound of music in the air can do to make downtown a vibrant place people want to be. I would urge you to get involved with or start your own arts-based downtown group that embodies your vision. I think we'd both agree the mayor's office deals with too many things beyond your areas of passion and expertise, and that downtown specifically could benefit from your full attention.

By the way, I don't recommend getting mixed up with the River District Association. They have their own ideas, and I suspect it involves "young professionals," not young minds. Just imagine thousands of Patrick Batemans living in a skyrise downtown. Eesh. I'm sure you know Kim Wheeler, so you must also understand she's probably unfit to be leading the charge to resurrect downtown, unless maybe it was still the 1980s.

Art + Politics = Power

Jesus, you're an artist, right? I propose you make downtown your new canvas. Every single other candidate in the mayor's race has taken precious debate time to applaud you in one way or another. In the next debate, you should ask each of them whether they will commit to your vision of downtown as a pedestrian-friendly festival atmosphere. Frankly, I'd like to know which of them recognizes the real merit and viability of transforming downtown in the very simple ways you've laid out. They would work wonders and give the city something to be proud of. Let's see who among them is willing to embrace a good idea that was not their own.

Make Larry and Doug, either of which could win at this point, give you a seat at the table.

By the way, you get a special shout-out for the Peter Criss sweater and the crack about Larry and Doug's personal argument. You were right in noting its absurdity, as was John Harmon when he called the issue a red herring.

Let's work on 2013 by transforming downtown first. If you can make an impact there, you will have the collective ear of the people as someone who is capable of attaining results. As I alluded in my last piece, a single citizen can often do more than a single elected official. It's the clout you gain now that will determine how far you can take things in the future.

Put on some gloves, Jesus, because it's time to start squeezing balls while you have a share of the spotlight with the other men running for mayor.

Shit, you may even wanna bluff by saying you're in command of a street army larger in number than Operation Desert Storm. Based on the sweater, I'd go so far as to suggest you claim to have the full allegiance of the Kiss Army at your behest. It couldn't hurt. Drive them with fear into utter submission, which is the intended place for an elected public servant.

Do this in remembrance of me.

Your friend,

The Patriot

Yep, I'm still smellin' trouble for Larry

Does anyone else get the feeling aldermen are delaying budget cuts until the last possible moment for the most devious of reasons?

Could it be council Democrats and Republicans, working in concert, are preparing for a March 30 drive-by anal-rape of all the projects Morrissey holds dear? I'm betting on it.

By delaying any real public deliberations on the budget cuts, Morrissey has been left in the dark and out of the loop, Baby.

I mean, they haven't talked about anything. There are, of course, the obvious issues of ambulance fees, minimum staffing in the fire department and the less-talked-about scheduling changes in the police department. But those are drops in the bucket when we're talking about $8 million worth of snips. They could be made anywhere, and it'll be fun watch, courtesy of handsomely-compensated, yet technologically inept, Comcast.

The trap will be sprung the night before the city's mandated deadline for passing its spending plan. If, for whatever reason, they don't pass a budget, the projected deficit just got a whole lot worse. It won't happen, though, despite Pat Curran's anxiety nightmares.

There's a bit of a Monday night ritual here at the compound. Friends, acquaintances, strangers and political figures begin knocking on my door around 4 pm, usually disturbing my breakfast, but at least they bear gifts, guns and good memories.

Martinis are deployed and smoke permeates the air. A line begins to form for the bathroom before the meeting eventually gets started, no less than 30 minutes late usually. A hundred tenuously-filled shot glasses litter the coffee table and the game begins. The rules are simple.

You drink a shot whenever:
-Linda McNeely says "Mr. Mayor"
-Larry says "Thank you very much," which we all repeat in Elvis voices
-Frank Beach votes against a liquor license
-Joe Sosnowski or Jeff Holt abstain from a vote because of a conflict of interest
-Pat Curran brings apple-related goodies for the council
-Doug Mark's hair is a little goofy
-Carl Wasco doesn't make sense
-Victory Bell says "aldermans"
-Lenny Jacobson says "Your Honor"
-Anne Thompson looks surprised because of a plastic surgery disaster
-Bill Timm thanks a department head
-John Beck tries to justify the millions of taxpayer dollars thrown into the Metrocentre
-Dan Conness fucks up trying to read

So, why will donkeys and elephants stampede together Monday night? Because the mayor is neither, Holmes.

This certainly isn't a year that Republicans expect to have a chance for the mayor's mansion. Even Jan Klaas is laughing at John Harmon. Kind of a shame any way you look at it. Historically, the guy's 100% unlikable, but I've gotta admit again, a conservative might be the best thing for the city right now. I know it won't happen, however, so that really just leaves Larry and Doug.

That is not meant to discourage Jesus Correa, by the way. He's stated there's no way he'll win, but that doesn't mean he hasn't got ideas that he's not in a unique position to share with a relatively wider audience than he'll find in a coffee shop or bar that's already tuned him out. I'm all ears, Jesus, and so are our readers. My invitation stands if you have any sort of platform you'd like to share.

It's encouraging to see that at least the local media acknowledge a Green Party candidate, and that Jesus is being included in the mayoral forums. I have much to teach you about running a real campaign, Jesus, but you and your friends are spending entirely too much time looking for clippings on this blog, and not nearly enough time getting off your Generation-Why? asses.

By the way, you and your friend - I'll call him beefcake - have developed impotence over some photo I posted along with a reference to you. HINT: Don't post it on the internet if you don't want people to see it.

[THIS IS NOT A PHOTO OF JESUS CORREA VII]

Is there a photo you'd prefer me to use, or should I just not give Correa any more free press? Shall I also remove Mr. Correa from my mayoral poll? Hell, I'll remove every reference to Jesus ever being in the race. Would that make you happy? Can do. Awaiting your prompt approval to do so, and I'll pull the butt-plug right away.

City Hall is already filled with assholes, beef-beef. There's no room for you, but you're welcome to stay in the political manger with the rest of the sheep and swine.

Free advice to Jesus: Ditch anyone who thinks that was a piece of photography good enough to be some sort of bargaining chip on a blog that means absolutely nothing to anyone.

Back to the two-way race between Block and Morrissey. For a time, I believed Republicans would stand behind Larry, because an independent is better than a Democrat in their eyes, right?

That does not seem to be the case now. The two parties appear to be doing away with any hope for a three-or-more-party system in Rockford, despite indie aldermanic candidates. Larry was set-up from the beginning, and it'll be a long time before another third-party candidate holds the mayor's office. Aldermen will do their best to see to that March 30.

That's not to say I support Larry. We're just talking politics here. Jesus (not Correa), take your heart and blood pressure medications already. Mr. Correa, you should probably take your meds, too, whatever they may be. We will all need to be heavily sedated once Doug Block or Larry Morrissey wins.

Why wait? I think I'll sedate myself now.

It doesn't seem to be working. Shit.

Harmon makes surprisingly strong showing in debate

After having watched the Register Star debate in its entirety, it's clear Larry Morrissey recognizes his only real opponent in the race right now is Doug Block. He went on the offensive several times, challenging Block to think as a mayor, not as a union rep, and to publicly acknowledge that the union needs to make concessions or accept changes for the sake of the city's fiscal health. Well played, Mr. Mayor.

The problem with this two-way race is that John Harmon has far more interesting things to say than Block does, but Block has the bruised legs of the police union to keep him in the press.

If, as I've predicted, the fire fighter union will be appeased (they're VERY happy if they keep four men on an engine), the police union may be alone in supporting Block. Block would do the same for the fire fighters, but as I've noted, the fire fighters know Larry's bound to win. They know it may not bode well if they go against him now.

If the police union wants to get the public on its side, it needs to start doing something about the crime. YOU are the ones I see driving past open-air drug markets. YOU are the ones I see bullshitting with your buddies in the parking lots. YOU are the ones I see turning on your cherries just to go through the red lights. YOU are the ones in MY rear-view mirror when you ought to be ridding the streets of the filth that threatens my family's safety. Don't fucking talk to me about the mayor or the chief. They can't be blamed for your inaction. Start making a difference and people will care more about what you have to say.

Harmon presented a fairly strong case for change and actually seems to have a logical, no-nonsense plan to cut spending. He's a conservative, and I have to admit that might do the city some good right now. It's been a long time.

His platform also seems to have an emphasis on creating jobs. Not sure how he plans to do that, but he's correct in that jobs would start healing some of the city's other ills, like poverty and crime. While Larry's emphasis seems to be education, jobs make at least as much sense. It's a reasonable priority, and one that a lot of unemployed folks might be interested in. This is easier said than done, though, so I'd like to hear more about his plan to make those jobs available ASAP.

It's important to note, however, that Harmon isn't picky about what types of jobs there are. Who knows. He could be right. Maybe we've been setting our sights too high. Baby steps first. On the other hand, I shudder to think about all the pig-slaughtering facilities, ethanol plants and environmental catastrophes this approach might welcome.

Fuck. I dunno. At the moment, I'm not unemployed, for which I'm very thankful. But because I do have a job and am able to pay my bills, I can't speak for the unemployed folks as to what sort of job they would or wouldn't take. My worry about bringing in these shit-jobs as a short-term fix is that we'll be stuck with them in better times.

While there are plenty of things he'd do differently, I like that Harmon praised Larry for the things he's gotten right. If I know Harmon at all, that was probably a difficult thing to do, but it showed some class.

As I've stated before, Harmon's just not a factor in the race, yet, but I'm starting to like the guy. That's saying a lot, because I usually think he's a complete bastard and I don't like the shitheels he hangs out with, truly.

As a Republican, its an uphill battle for him in a Democratic city. To have any chance, he's gonna need to keep the anti-Democrat rhetoric toned down - not an easy task for him - because he's gonna need a lot of their votes to have any chance. I also have doubts as to how strongly Jan Klaas at GOP HQ will want to support him financially.

In short, I guess I'm just a little disappointed Block is posing the biggest threat to Morrissey, because from what I've seen, Harmon clearly deserves that distinction. I hope the press will start paying a little more attention to him instead of just giving Block all the free campaign spots.

I'll probably wait until the last minute, or the maybe the last week, before I make any sort of painful endorsement (and I do realize that counts for nothing, because who the fuck am I?), but for those looking for a mayor who will trim the fat, I think Harmon's your guy.

Correa scores a three-pointer vs. Morrissey @ RRStar debate

I'm working my way through a replay of yesterday's mayoral debate at the Rockford Register Star. From time to time, you can hear John Harmon consoling Jesus Correa, who often looks as though he's about to burst into tears as he stumbles for words to spit out.

When Larry Morrissey boasted about jobs added at Anderson Packaging - calling it a shining example of a TIF - Correa called him on it. Unfortunately, by this time, most people had tuned him out.

Last year, Anderson Packaging was given $1.1 million in TIF incentives. I'm told by company insiders that Anderson execs allegedly celebrated their windfall at strip clubs in Lake Geneva, but I can't verify this.

In exchange, Anderson Packaging promised 150 new jobs. Five months later, the company shitcanned 167 of its senior employees - the ones who were making too much - the ones who can be replaced with cheaper labor. Before the deal expires, Anderson could very well uphold its end of the bargain, but at the cost of its most loyal employees, and with lower-paying jobs.

After Morrissey cited the Anderson TIF deal, Correa noted the company had been given money to create jobs, only to turn around and permanently lay all these folks off. Way to go, Jesus!

I'm sure I'll have some more thoughts about this debate as I make my way through it. Stay tuned...

Rockford's city fathers to perform coathanger-abortion of employees - SuperBlock nowhere to be found

I'm still nursing a state-of-the-city-hangover, but as those of us with "true grit" will acknowledge, there's no better cure than the hair of the dog that bit you.

It's about 5 a.m. and I'm celebrating - well, the kind of somber celebration one would allow in memory of a friend who's passed -because tonight, the city's alpha males and females will roll in shit when when life as city employees know it will forever be altered as a direct result of wasteful spending while the gettin' was good.

Tonight, the proposed budget comes before the full City Council. City Hall will stink of wet, mangy mutts as the aldermen who've allowed this mess to happen squirm and cower to be thrown a re-election bone. They can blame Morrissey all they want, but remember that they went along with all of it.

Especially considering that Larry's an Independent, you'd expect that Democrats and Republicans would have been doing their homework to keep him honest, but they obviously haven't. As one regular caller to WNTA would say, "Get rid of the bums!"

We're talking about a bunch of political hobbyists who are more concerned about status and throwing their weight around than doing the jobs they're charged with. They share in the blame for the failed expectations of the Morrissey administration, and so do we for that matter.

This mayoral election, despite Morrissey's emphasis on education, will be decided on the issue of public safety. That's what, from the beginning, made Doug Block the front runner to challenge the incumbent.

John Harmon is not a factor in the race and Jesus Correa just needs to take his egocentric art project back to his bedroom. I think it's fair to say both gentlemen are barely tolerated, even by their friends.

Aldermen have allowed Morrissey to run rampant with development funds, which has effectively raped the general fund to benefit developers who hardly need the breaks. And how is Rockford any better for these "investments?" Nothing I've seen supports the notion that TIF benefits anyone but property mongers.

Instead of taking the mayor to task for misuse of taxpayer dollars, aldermen are going to go along with cuts to the level of service Rockfordians pay too handsomely for - with a real, human cost - just so they can later claim balancing the budget as a victory.

You can't lay all the blame on Larry. Despite failure, at least he tried to do something. I'm beginning to think he might be the best one to get us out of this. It's kinda like how G.W. won re-election on the notion that we shouldn't change commanders-in-chief at wartime. Then again, we were probably wrong in that "choice."

Simply put, if Doug Block thinks he can manage to fill an $8 million budget hole without touching public safety, now's the time to for him to speak up. You can point to Adam Smith-types all you want, but the problem is much bigger than a handful of $100k jobs. Where, Mr. Block, do you propose to pull $8 million from the 30 percent of the city budget not directly attributable to public safety? Do you even recognize how we came to be in this awkward, prone position? Seriously, Dude, I hope you have more to say than, "Protect union jobs."

It's 2009 in Rockford, and it's still appropriate for residents to hang their heads in shame. Next year's looking no better and the Forest City isn't likely to see significant change in the next four years, despite having sons of Illinois in high places nationally. Remember, we're still the people who re-elected Blago, but only because the alternative was that allegedly "medicated nutcase," Judy Baar Topinka.

As my father once quipped, "Rockford is the asshole of Illinois." He was absolutely right then, and it still holds true, unfortunately. Like it or not, of the candidates we have, I think Larry best recognizes Rockford's history of mediocity, which is the first step to at least upgrading Rockford to taint-status.

First things first - the basics. There's some validity - in real dollars - to Larry's priority of decreasing truancy. As he noted during his annual campaign address last week, companies don't choose to locate in communities with great fire departments. They choose to locate in communities where their children can get a decent education. I think it's a crusade that makes sense.

Again, Mr. Block, where do you stand on issues that do not directly involve the unions? What about the rest of Rockford? Gotham City needs a hero. Take the union-cock out of your mouth and spit out a couple solutions. Otherwise, just shut up and go play with Jesus Correa in Prozac-land.

The straight 'dope' about the 11th Ward

Well, County Board member Karen Elyea vanquished former County Board member Tuffy Quinonez in the 11th Ward's Democratic primary for City Council. Jesus, talk about two exceedingly poor choices. Go ahead and search their names through the circuit clerk's online case files. I'll wait.

Note that Tuffy is a nickname. His real first name is Theophelo. Charges alleged battery, possession of controlled substances, etc. Folks allege Elyea is no better.

As recently as 2003, she was charged with alleged manufacturing/delivery of cannabis and sale of drug paraphernalia. Some would allege you can still walk into her store, and walk out with a variety of goodies from around the world, but I'm not into hippie stuff.

If you search the name of her live-in boyfriend, James Harnden, you'll see they're made for each other: There are several charges alleging DUI's, drugs, etc. Oh, it appears they might owe some folks money, too. In one case, in which Karen and James are named defendants, you'll notice her last name is spelled AYLEA, so who knows how many more 'typos' may be obscuring her in the system.

There are rumors of other alleged business ventures she's involved in, but if that's true, she must be keeping her distance and letting others do the gritty work. She does appear to try pushing what little political weight she has around, though.

Within a block of her place, someone appears to have exerted some influence to allegedly crush would-be retail competitors in the local market. One nearby store was closed down after it was discovered it was an alleged bodega.

The hammer also came down on another nearby store that may or may not have been offering a little friendly competition, but one can never be sure.

Frankly, I'm surprised Quinonez couldn't beat Elyea (a DINO, or Democrat in name only, as Chuck Sweeny would say) in a ward with such a high Hispanic concentration.

I'm betting Tuffy is pissed, to say the least, that Elyea ran against him after he helped her get elected to the county board, where she's consistently aligned herself with Republicans. So, although she seems to have much in common with Tuffy, she's significantly less loyal to her party's label.

It should be noted Elyea associates with the likes of John Harmon, a Republican former county board member now running for mayor, and Jim Hughes. Hughes, for a time, was a well-known Democrat, but now that his paycheck is signed by his Republican keepers, he's looks to be playing for the other side.

Just last night, while watching the city council telecast, the two DINO's could be seen sitting together. A banister obstructed the camera's view from the chest down, but with a little imagination, it appeared as though Elyea was jerking Hughes off in the gallery, metaphorically.

With only a couple independents challenging her in April to take Jeff Holt's seat, she unfortunately appears to be a shoe-in. From what I hear, Holt is backing her. I always thought he was brighter than that, but you learn something new everyday. Then again, I suppose Tuffy couldn't expect the endorsement after raising a big stink about Holt's residency after he'd already announced he wouldn't be seeking another term on the council. Talk about burning a bridge unnecessarily. That probably made the difference in the primary.

Honestly, I don't care what someone does for a living, and I believe many types of things ought to be legal, or decriminalized at the very least.

Karen and Tuffy are probably fun to party with, but they are not the sort of representation the 11th Ward needs. It looks to me like their only motives for seeking political office are to protect their personal interests.

But, that's par-for-course in the Forest City. You don't gotta love it, but it looks like we gotta live with it a while longer.